Help need advice on TA TCB

I am in need of some guidance please. I am about to do the Territoral Commissioning Board in the near future. Can someone email me or post the outline of what the different aspects of the TCB are. I cant find anything on the web and I dont want to arse it up.

Can someone tell a) fitness requirements b) the sort of tests and what they involve please. I am in TA regiment rather than OTC so I dont have access to pre-TCB any advice would be greatly appreciated in confidence. My email is Thanks.
I suggest using the search function to find other TCB or RCB threads (cough cough), as there is some good stuff on ARRSE aleady.

This little gem was given to me when i was looking for advice on TCB.
- I can claim not credit sadly as it's a classic :(

The recent spate of success of Fallowfield OTC at RCB has lead to the
production of a definitive précis on how to pass RCB. This précis is
clearly destined for higher accolades than the confines of Fallowfield
OTC and it is hoped that you may have a few more points to add to or
refine this fine document before wider publication.

ADVICE FOR RCB Compiled by Lt-Col Pigard-Smithe MBE MSc LCGI
Commanding Officer Fallowfield OTC

1. Turn up smart. Bring a pet.
2. Smile like Chester at all times.
3. Use the following buzz-phrases. Remember shout don't say: a) Listen in
b) Switch on c) On me d) Ich bin ein homosexual
4. Arse lick the DS. Call them "Mate" and "Honey". When referring one
DS to another, call the other "Geezer".
5. Discussion. Take lots of photos. Say "Um" and "Err" loudly.
6. Interviews. Put the interviewer at ease. Kiss their hands. Tell
them how much you like shooting animals. Flutter your eyelashes. If
you wear a skirt, give them a flash of your underwear. Put on your
scouse accent. Ask the DS about the family/holiday/gardening etc.
7. Planning. Put off your opponents. Kick them under the table. Play
footsie with the girls. When someone else balls up and the DS asks
you "Is that right number X" say "That's Bull-shit mate/honey!" Cry.
Fart when asked a question.
8. P.T. One of Viscount Slim's leadership qualities is "Initiative".
State this and run backwards. Sing American Marching Songs.
9. Leadership. Show emotions, lose that temper! After a tense bit
break the ice with a joke - "I need a ****" always works. Shout "No
you fat waster!" if someone falls off on your task. Kick and punch
the incompetent - this shows "Enthusiasm" another of Viscount Slim's
Leadership qualities.
10. Smoke during the COs Brief. Nobody else will - they are too
scared. "Courage" is another of Viscount Slim's leadership qualities.
11. Closing race. Force your team to do it twice. Remember
"Willpower" is one of Viscount Slim's leadership qualities.
12. Your last impression. Tell them to "Enjoy the Hill". When the DS
say "What hill?", tell them about one of your Monster Tabs last
summer up a shallow incline. Knowledge is another of Viscount Slim's
leadership qualities.

S_S Out.

Latest Threads