Help, Fancy Dress Ball ideas needed

Much as this may be a bad idea I am reduced to seekign the collective "wisdom" of ARRSE for fancy dress ideas.

Theme is "The British Empire" and needs to work for a couple. I dont want Army orientated stuff but a little more out of the box like.....

Fish and Chips
Tea and Scones
Bacon and Eggs
Jordan and Peter

All suggestions welcome.... ta

 

Burberry and White Lightning?

 

British Empire, you say?

Why not dress-up as any one of hundreds of indigenous tribes to whom we brought peace, stability, justice, smallpox, internecine turmoil, corruption and email scams etc. Should go down a treat.

 

Dress up as an old-fashioned cinema.

 

Dress up as a British East India Company soldier.

Bring a few friends dressed as dead natives for authenticity.

 

Or a big game hunter and a dead lion (or buffalo).

 

Shame you don't want to do any of the Army stuff, as there's plenty of it. You could all ways black up and go as one of many native territories ... unless you are black ... in that case why not white up instead. Why not construct a paper mache body and cover it in small toy monkeys and go as the Rock of Gibraltar. Or shave your head and go as Gandhi. Failing that, go as something completely random ... Santa or Darth Vader.

Anyway, you think yours is bad, ours is the letter P. I'm thinking of wearing a maroon sweatshirt and trousers, covering myself in purple and red balloons and wearing a paper mache ass on my head and going as piles.

 

Or a drug smuggler. Just don't order a Chinese takeaway while in costume.

 

The obvious is huge shorts a bush jacket and a pith helmet but even though they were standard wear for all and sundry they may have a psuedo military look to them.

I suppose dressing as Queen Victoria is out of the question and I'm not sure if you could do one of the King Emperors, not in any recognisable way at least.

Cricketing whites.

Wear a large globe with most of the world in red.
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If you want "Empire" but not Army, why not just follow the example of the Andrw and shell the buggers from offfshore?

 

Go as Hong Kong Phooey or Blackadder.

 

Go as an envious Frenchman.

 

Look, all you have to do is turn up & then as the evening progresses start fights with everyone around you. Capture their tables, claim them as your own, and then toward the end of the night give them back to other people instead causing a huge row.

 

You wear DJ top bow tie + fours and boots = A Social Climber

She wears tight red top and small White shorts = A Welsh Hooker

 

Not Empire, but you could do it cheap without having the bother of hiring fancy dress.

Just wear a pair of underpants and when asked what you are supposed to be, say to them.....

"I'm a Premature Ejaculation! I've just come in my pants."