Have you shagged Tiger Woods?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by auscam, Dec 8, 2009.

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  1. Yes, hasn't everyone?

  2. No, I'm the only one

  3. Maybe, I was pissed

  4. What the ****'s it got to do with you?

    0 vote(s)
  5. I'm saving myself for Jesus

  6. **** owes me a tenner

  7. It's a bit dusty in here

  8. What's 'rooted'?

  9. Who's Tiger Woods?

  10. I prefer your Mum

  1. Since the aptly-named Tiger is allegedly into double figures, is there a mortal limit to his influence, or is it only a matter of time before we all get a random seeing-to?

    Fuck, I thought I'd deleted this. Too late now!
  2. For those who aren't fluent in kangarooian, a 'root' is a shag. Also, flipflops are called thongs, a duvet is a doona and grouse means good. Odd, odd people.
  3. Everyone's heard of the term 'rooted' - although I always thought it was 'routed' - but it's not something I normally use a spell checker for saying that.
    You forgot 'Yoot', or 'Ute' or whatever the spelling is.
    PS - Aus, I voted for your mum. After all, she produced you, so she cant be that bad. :wink:
  4. Awwwww, thanks mate! I just switched on the Christmas lights too!
  5. I've voted, so throw another abo on the barbie or whatever it is you do down there.
  6. Funny you should say that... :twisted:
  7. OK, you bastards, so far Tiger and Mum are neck-and-neck, closely followed by Jesus. Jesus has a long history of tenacious performances, but then so has Tiger, and he hasn't been putting himself about for 2009 years. This could be a photo-finish...put some effort in, Mum!
  8. I tried to fuck Rolf Harris with a claw Hammer once, does that count ?

    er just off to the dunny to lite a dorrie up, by the bill a bong, then I'm going to throw a sheila on the barbie and cook a raw prawn.
  9. Which end?
  10. The claw end, you numptyhead, whats the point of hitting someone with the handle end of a claw hammer :WINK:
  11. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    I thought the missus done me in my sleep with her 'Mamba' the other week, but now I'm not sure. All I know is that it was dark, and my arrse still hurts.
  12. But I did leave you 50p under the pillow.
  13. Good one Mum, 16% improvement, you can put the kettle on now.
  14. Is anybody in the slightest bit suprised that this has happened?
    It was only a matter of time before some sh*t appeared about 'clean cut' 'All American' Tiger but f*ck me! He's getting hammered at the minute.

    He is worth millions, he jets off around the world and has more than likely rattled 5 times what has been leaked in the papers........wouldn't you? F*ckin right you would.

    OK, so his name is Eldrick and he should never ever take off that baseball cap but there's going to be f*nny dripping off him wherever he goes.........Shag away Tiger, never mind that the missus is stunning and most men would gnaw off a testicle just to sniff her gusset, sow those racially spurious oats.
  15. In tenuously-related news, the scrubber hostie who allegedly ROOTED Ralph Fiennes in the aircraft brasco (pure class, that) has been had up for fraud.