WARNING... There is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand! This virus is called Casual and Daily Events Trauma Syndrome (CADETS). If you receive CADETS from any of our instructors, the Major or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH! This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with CADETS take 2 good friends to the nearest pub. Purchase the antidote known as Best-Equivalent- Extractor-Remedy (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until CADETS has been completely eliminated from your system. Forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5 friends you have already been infected and CADETS is controlling your life.