Hallowe'en

#1
Been having a discussion with wife and asked a few others and am getting a mixed response.

When I was young, if Hallowe'en fell on a Sunday as it does next week then we were to go out trick or treating on the Saturday as you can't have Hallowe'en on a Sunday.

Now maybe it's a Scottish thing or possibly only in fairly religious communities (most people went to church a few times a year in my neighbourhood in the 80's)

Anyone else ever heard of this?
 
#2
I don't know about that. All I know is that unlike the US, treating round here means money, with bigger kids waiting to take the cash, they turn their noses up at sweets...and trick means that the nasty little cunts throw raw eggs and flour over your car and windows if they don't get cash.

My idea of a treat would be to smack them around the head until they are brain damaged.
 
#3
I don't know about that. All I know is that unlike the US, treating round here means money, with bigger kids waiting to take the cash, they turn their noses up at sweets...and trick means that the nasty little cunts throw raw eggs and flour over your car and windows if they don't get cash.

My idea of a treat would be to smack them around the head until they are brain damaged.
Impossible..... Their heads are non-vital organs.
 
#4
Halloween in Australia is a valuable training tool for single mothers. It enables the shiftless slags to get their little bastards used to sponging at an earlier age.
 

TheIronDuke

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Book Reviewer
#5
Whatever became of the fine old English Haloween traditions? Tramping the bare autumn fields with ones chums in search of a suitable turnip. Returning breathless, with ruddy faces and dirty hands, ones breath misting in the cold crisp air. Stuffing the turnip into a pair of Mams old tights and braying a Catholics dog over the head then stuffing a pole up its arse, dressing it up as the Pope and torching it?

These days its all materialism.
 
#6
We were having a party at Hallowe'en two years ago when three little lovelies came to the door, dressed up in all the gear, shortie skirts, benders, the lot. (They can't have been more than thirteen/fourteen but you know what they look like at that age - a fair bit older, and with all that tarty bloody gear on too)

My so called fucking bastard of a mate answers the door and they chorused "Trick or treat?"

The dirty bastard shouts "Treat!!!"

Just as I arrived at the door and clocked their mothers stood at the end of the path, dressed as witches, supporting their little girls going round the street trick or treating.
Cue me doing some hefty explaining the next day as I denied all knowledge of the cunt, saying he'd gatecrashed the party.
The bastard. Mates eh?

Oh how we laughed about that in the pub later.
 
#7
I think this was so you could go out two nights in a row. We never called it trick or treat but nick-knockin, probably to do with nicking peoples flower pots or garden ornaments, knocking the door and running away. Wasn't a good night out unless you got shot at by your neighbours.
 
#8
Halloween in Australia is a valuable training tool for single mothers. It enables the shiftless slags to get their little bastards used to sponging at an earlier age.
They're on the street already anyway.
 
#9
Been having a discussion with wife and asked a few others and am getting a mixed response.

When I was young, if Hallowe'en fell on a Sunday as it does next week then we were to go out trick or treating on the Saturday as you can't have Hallowe'en on a Sunday.

Now maybe it's a Scottish thing or possibly only in fairly religious communities (most people went to church a few times a year in my neighbourhood in the 80's)

Anyone else ever heard of this?
I have been under the same impression, mate. Although cant seem to get a definate answer from anyone.
 
#10
Well Halloween is the eve of All Saints Day which always falls on November 1st except in Orthodox Christian countries which do it sometime in the spring. I have never heard of it being moved around to avoid Sundays as the feast would take precedence over the Sunday services. I know this is the date in RC, CoE and Lutheran churches. Not sure if the Church of Scotland does feasts the same way.

Maybe your parents wanted to be sure your homework and revisions were done for Monday AM.
 
#11
Best holiday of the year

Women dressed as slutty vampires , slutty nurses, slutty witches slutty ....... you can see the common theme here :)
 
#12
make the little buggers work for their treat. I hang strips of white synthetic sheets from the porch which they have to fight through, including a couple of motion activated ghoulies (available from ASDA), screaming sound effects are played off the PC and when they get to the door I meet them in fancy dress.
My neighbour goes for it big time, a couple of years ago he buried himself in his front lawn and popped up to give the little dears their treats, last year he sat on a chair covered in gauze with UV lights. He then jumped up as the little loves came up the path.

At about 7pm all goes quiet so I go over the road to the birthday party for the little witch who was born on halloween.
 
#13
Bloke who used to live in the patch was about 6'2 - made himself a costume in the theme of Frankenstiens monster, which included platform shoes and an extension to his bonce which took his height to about the 7 foot mark. Plus his costume was VERY good.

He stopped answering the door to trick or treaters after three succesive groups of youngsters had ran off screaming and his wife took over the duties (well it was on the patch, whilst the fathers would probably laughed their tits off about it the mothers would have been going ape).

With that in mind, I have a very good vampire outfit this year with very realistic teeth (and blood...!). I am NOT on the patch, so should have some fun this year!
 
#15
Trust the Septics to make a child's game and family tradition out of demanding money with menaces.

I'll get with the spirit of horror this year and give 'treats' of an eyeless rabbit's head on a string.
 
#16
Many years back, we had family and young kids staying with us and I'd made a point of buying a wolfman mask and big hairy glove type hands with long claws, especially to put the shits up them. I duly put on the gear upstairs and must admit it was pretty horrific, hairy face, wrinkled nose, big fangs and pointy ears. Opening the door to the room they were all in, I went in at the crouch, giving it a big rarrrgh!! The kids all screamed and my 86lb..yes 86lb.. bull terrier came at me in full protective mode, snarling with lips curled up showing huge fucking teeth. I only just managed to leap back, shouting fuck off! and shut the door on him. I almost crapped myself and I was almost too scared to go back in after removing the mask and claws, when I did, apparently I was a bit white, but the kids thought it was great.
 
#17
Wonderful what a bit of imagination can do. Never knew about it being moved because of a Sunday. We don't get bothered too much now since my neighbour got his big f-off dog. But it used to be fair game for the little shitbags to be out in force from mid-October onwards until after Guy Fawkes night even.

Trick or treat? WTF is that (apart from yet another yank import?) Give me good old Scottish guising where you would dress up like Boris Karloff's auntie, get invited into some people's gaff, sing a song or tell a joke and get a handful of sweets or a cake.

Nowadays, if you tell them to get off your doorstep, they'd just as likely mallet the doorstep and chuck the bits through your windows.

Ah, come the revolution! Yes you little shitbags, just you wait! Norfolk's got one big f-off surprise for you.
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#18
Meh. Many years ago, my three lovely little (7-12) God Daughters (and before you ask? Yeah, they are now grown-up with tits and that. I am still their Godfather. Maybe go and check if your parking ticket has run out before we have a fuss? Cheers.)

Where was I? Ah yes. The village Vicar, up near Otterburn, declared Halloween was the work of Santa. Cue me and 3 painted Muppets being Ninjas in the local grave yard, howling like Banshees, Werewolves, Vampires, the Undead and in my case, Lilly Savage.

Still one of the best moments of my life.

These days I just borrow Pazza's scrap yard Rottweiler and put her in the garden. She's called 'Satan'. Paz is a misfit, but he has a fine sense of irony.
 
#19
This used to be fun. Eggs and Toilet Paper and Flour and stealing candy from the pre-teen set on their way back home, pillow cases stuffed with crapass candy retailers put on sale only at that time of the year. Never could find sugar filled teeth rotting stuff any other time of the year. all suspect brand names.. recall Popeye ' cigarettes ' phony candy smokes, don't sell them anymore as smoking is bad imagemaking, not PC.

Nowadays, Hallowe'en is second to Christmas in spending in America, you can order up all sorts of mechanical and electronic scare stuff to decorate your house and gardens, fog machine rentals go through the roof and costumes cost a small fortune - though every little punk wants to look like the latest action movie character - Daughter went out as Zorro one year.. no one knew who she was- idiots.

Some schlub down the road from me puts himself through self-mutilation every year carving pumpkins- admittedly they are mini-works of art, every impressive- and lines them up down his driveway. Has little lightbulbs rigged in each one [ no candles - he learned fast one year ]. Takes him at least a couple of weeks to carve them all and he stores them in his garage fridge so they don't rot beforehand. If they last ten minutes in his drive before being kicked in by the older feckers who come scrounging in crap ' costumes' they put 6 seconds into ' making', he's lucky.

I'll just do what I always do, go load up on cheap candy, scare the sh!t out of the kids with my natural ugly mug and keep the sweets for myself.
 
#20
So halloween is upon us once again, need to make sure im either out or upstairs watching tv with all the lights out between 6 and 8pm ...............I hate halloween Bah humbug....!!!!!!! (or is that too early)
 
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