Great Street Arguments.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by maninblack, Nov 2, 2005.

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  1. maninblack

    maninblack LE Book Reviewer

    The Spousal Unit has just telephoned me in tucks of laughter.

    She was taking a shortcut home from the city centre which involved walking through one of Portsmouth's rougher areas (Somerstown)

    A elderly chav couple in their 30s were shouting at each other in the street. The parting shot from the man was;

    "I've 'ad you up every 'ole, you old whore."

    Nice. 8O

    Anyone else seen or heard any good ones lately?
  2. Yep, I heard one the other day. Similar situation, chav couple arguing.
    Male chav comes out with "Oi slag, get back in the house before I kick you in the (unt and give you fat lips!!"

  3. Actually! Just nipped out for lunch on the South Bank in the city And walking along I see a tiny chav type scote pinned to the floor with a 2 tonne builders mate holding back his arm!

    Apparently the chav scote had tried to hold up the shop with a knife and 2 tonne builders mate is having none of it and hauls him to the ground!!!!

    Last words of the chave before the rozzers showed up were "but I didn't even get a chance to nick nuffin"

    Priceless!!! :lol:
  4. Just got my first mortgage, moved in first night me and mrs essexbob settling down after a hards days moving. About 3am came the dulcet tones of one of our nieghbours

    "youve been up that tarts arse, now you think you are going to knob me you are fecking joking" :D :D

    met her the next day, butter would not melt in her mouth, warned us about the other neighbours who park acrross her drive.
  5. oh I wasn't copying I promise!
  6. I'll let you off
  7. fck me......I know those two......St James Road.......outside the Co-Op was it!!!!!!!!!??????
  8. Would this be a lady looking for some action then Bob? Assume you have been inundated with address requests or 'can you put me up for the night mate?'
  9. Back in the mists of time Whiffler was proceeding down Southend High Street in a southerly direction, when a shout from a nearby resident caught his attention.

    I quickly established that I was not the object of this dis-shevelled oik's ire. Instead he was red in the face and having a pop at a grey upright type, cursing and swearing loudly. Although not wholly intelligible, the oik seemed to be upset that grey upright type had offended him in some way - indeed had most likely moved to block his route (from one drinking dive to the next perhaps).

    It was difficult to read the grey upright type, and I wasn't the only one who was now watching to see what happened next. There was almost a ring of people who on another day might have been chanting "fight, fight, fight" by they were silent and kept a respectful distance. Many others glanced at the confrontation and moved swiftly on.

    After nearly a minute of haranguing the grey upright type the oik shuffled awy, turning every few seconds to cast back an angry look and some more colourful invective. The grey upright type, who I should mention was somewhat larger and brighter than the oik, remained impassive throughout.

    Why do these oiks argue with lamp standards ?. Next time I saw the oik I was several floors up in the office, and he was in a grassed strip in a dual carriageway and shouting at a large brown type - I wish the tree had decked him.
  10. In a dim and distant past in the NE of England (1980s - Pre Chav Era) I was wandering down Chillingham Road when I came across a pre pubescent scrote effing and blinding at a lady. I gave the scrote the benefit of my wisdom and told him to leave the lady alone... only for the 'lady' to tell me to fcuk off and who the fcuk did I think I was speaking to her fcuking son like that? 8O 8O 8O

    Bet he's grown up into a fine specimen of a chav now.

  11. maninblack

    maninblack LE Book Reviewer

    That would be the route home, yes.