Great Kit - none of it


War Hero
I have been in theatre seven weeks now, and have yet to be issued with Osprey Armour that fits or a 6A helmet and yet I see civvy contractors with the helmets, and camp rats with the armour. I am trying to chase it up with my own G4 to no avail. Apparently there are 15000 sets of Osprey within the two main theatres - enough for two each for frontline troops yet I go on patrol without. Serve me right for being a fat b'st'rd but whats a man to do - run off to the papers - refuse to go on patrol?
Any serious suggestions?


complain up the CoC only way

Welcome to the club. In Afghan it took us 2 months before Osprey and a limited number of Kestrel started arriving in theatre. I can say that approx 800 sets of osprey were in theatre and issued to EVERYONE who needed / required it whilst out on the ground. On the size issue, most of the armour was 180 /116 or 190 /120 so yes you are a bit of a porker if none fits you.

All I can suggest is that you carry on using ECBA until the time you can be issued a larger set of osprey. Probably not what you wanted to hear, however, ECBA does work and it's better than a desert shirt as a bullet stopper!

Wax on

Mr Miyagi
Start keeping a diary. God forbid that you or one of your guys is killed or badly injured, it may well be useful. This of course is of little use to you when taking a 7.62 through the chest, but if sonmebody in the CoC is "turning a blind eye" then there is very little you can do.

Although, I suspect that given the number of journalists and interested parties trawling ARRSE for the sharp end view, and coming three weeks after the inquest into Sgt Roberts that many of them may well start to ask how we can be in the same postion three years into the op.

Good luck and keep your head down.
for goodness sake man keep complaining up your CoC , I have spent a lot of time and money having you trained and transported out there , FFS you are a very expensive asset and I cant keep loosing you all just for the cost of some body armour.
In the mean time as already said keep your head down ,stay safe and maybee diet :D

Contractors get the kit because either:

They go out and buy it;
Their boss says "my lads aren't going anywhere until they get it from the MoD as promised".

The Army - run by dedicated professionals who live by "Serve to Lead" - tells you to STFU and get on with it.

If I was you my missus would probably be phoning the press about now - but I'm a STAB so I've got no pension at threat from a vindictive CoC.


One_of_the_strange said:
Contractors get the kit because either:

They go out and buy it;
Their boss says "my lads aren't going anywhere until they get it from the MoD as promised".


Another big driver of that is insurance requirements.


Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Get your BAFF application in and get them on the case!


War Hero
Thanks Guys, I really just needed to blow off some steam - interesting points none the less. My issued set just fits over a t shirt and shirt but when you start adding softies and smocks I have a problem. Lack of helmets really is just a crime.
Slimfast it is then :oops: !
Danielson, get your father to write to his MP and write direct to Des Browne. If you are not satisfied with the answer PM me and I will forward you a good letter to write, with your father's name on the bottom of it.
danielsan said:
Thanks Guys, I really just needed to blow off some steam -

Please don't break wind in the current affairs forum.

Its good to see threads like this developing, knowing that they are least being read by the occasional sympathetic ear and by people in postitions to be able to do something about it.

I am going to start a thread asking why my chateau in Bordeaux hasn't been provided free of charge.

You could improvise, and manufacture your own 'in theatre' bullet repelling armour. Suggest using a couple of spare landrover tyres, some dexian wrapping and a necklace made from track pads..... you'll look nails.

You wouldn't have been worried about armour if you had listened to your PTIs in training... you'd be able to outrun munitions and failing that deflect them with your beautiful bronze body.



Your Chateau is being used as a Grace and Favour residence for Prescott, Brown & Browne (Bliar would use it but you don't get enough Airmiles from flying there)


War Hero
You have not been issued maahuusive, fat boy, sized body armour because the money was spent on really important stuff like "neckcoolers" and "camp chairs, REMF, camp rat, use of".
Be Happy, dont panic. If you do get dinged you'll get to watch the fcuking big televisons in the hospitals.
On a semi serious note, I couldn't get over the amount of genuinely crap gear which was issued to me. Next time, just give me some vouchers and a fair go on the interweb.


The size problem is an age old one. I didn't have a set of CBA to deploy on Op Telic because i am 6 ft 6" tall. The 190/120 set looked like an armoured bra. It took 2 1/2 months to get the tailor made set to me, and by that time we were all parked up and waiting to come home.

What is the system going to do for the Guards Bn's when they deploy with loads of big blokes?
Put in a redress of greviance to your OC or direct line manager. My understanding of this process is that it keeps going up (Unstopably so) until you are satisfied with the answer. One of the sub-unit comd in my unit is large (although he is not fat just massive in height and chest!) and the QM in indenting for his kit now for HERICK 7.
The crime here is the lack of awareness within your G4 chain to get this sorted. Your Sub Unit Comd should be on the phone every day until this gets sorted.

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