Gran 81 complains to Thomas Cook about her holiday in Spain ruined with too many Spanish people there...

Stayed on a Thai hotel barge anchored in the harbour while working in East Timor. Best night's kip ever! Usually out like a light within five minutes of getting my head down due to the gentle rocking of the ship. Refreshing kip too. Always felt good the next morning, even after the dire Oz beer at the Dengue Bar.
I am reminded of the old dit. No idea if it's true. I hope so. I served with a couple of squaddies that would have happily pulled this sketch.

A German has gone out on the town in London, got drunk and disorderly, and locked up by the Met Police. Next morning he is in court, but speaks no English. None of the court officials speak German. The magistrate appeals to the public in the gallery if anyone speaks German.

"I do" says a young man, reasonably smartly dressed.

"Would you mind translating for us?"

The young man makes his way into the main chamber from the gallery, and positions himself by the dock.

"Please would you ask the accused his name?"

The young man faces the accused and in a stage Kraut accent asks "Vot ist your name?" :)
Dad jokes. The joy of Arrse :D
Does anyone else have the problem when they know or are learning one foreign language, when visiting a third country, all their words come out in the foreign they do know.

I was in Italy, I had to answer everything in English because if I tried in Italian, they got "si, danke, ich herte gerne eine Carbonara bitte, shit ****, Por favor, bugger it" sinks into chair and looks at menu like a moron...

After leaving Germany for a while i used to speak to all the English taxi drivers in German????

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