Gordon the Chicken

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Surrey_Trog, Nov 12, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Trevor the farmer, was in the fertilised egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets' and eight or ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilise the eggs. The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so Trevor could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells. The farmer's favourite rooster was old Gordon, and a very fine specimen he was too, but on this particular morning Trevor noticed old Gordon's bell hadn't rung at all! Trevor went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover but to farmer Trevor's amazement, Gordon had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. Trevor was so proud of Gordon, he entered him into the West Berks County Fair and Gordon became an overnight sensation among the judges. The Result. The judges not only awarded Gordon the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.

    Clearly Gordon was a politician in the making: Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

    Do you know a Pullitician called Gordon ? ............ :D

    Edited twice for fat fingers, that and sheer incompetence! :roll:
     
  2. May I be first to be outraged on the behest of the hen fraternity! :(

    Are you in fact hennist? Despite Gorod who may or may not be cycloptic rooster, how do you think the wee feathery lassies feel??

    Shame on you :roll:

    Are all they are to you a spot of fun or a quick meal…….? :D