Gordon Brown .. Britains Highest Ranking Mong ??

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by NorthSeaTiger, May 9, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Just pay close attention the next time he is spouting drivel on the TV .. just watch his mouth when he stops speaking.

    Watch as his mouth drops into a complete slack jawed mong pose .. he looks like a fecking goldfish !! .. this happens every time he stops speaking and it makes me wonder how the Labour Spin Doctors have managed to stop him drooling and licking windows.

    I am in the process of contacting TV Cameramen on all the major channels, I intend to bribe them to hold a Bunch of balloons and an ice cream up as soon as he starts speaking in an effort to expose his true self. I might have to go as far as offering a Lord Anthony parka but any expense will be worth it .. Come to think of it Gola was always popular with the differently abled when I was a kid Is it still the brand of choice for Mongs ??

    I cant believe this has gone unnoticed for so long .. the filthy windowlicker.
     
  2. JESUS CHRIST MAN! can you imagine the carnage that massive mong could create? an ice cream could be the end of the camera man!
    FFS this is a potential disaster!
     
  3. Seen!

    Someone pointed that out to me a while ago and now every time he's on the box I just pish myself laughing at the goon.
     

  4. Agreed, to inflict that upon a cameraman is just plain cruel.

    Do they still have the public gallery open in the House of Commons ?? .. perhaps I could attend and get someone to ring me on my mobile having first put an ice cream van tune on as a ringtone. Balloons would be be a good visual way of inducing the full on slavver but not sure I could get them them past security, you have to assume that the guards have been informed of his mong qualities and will be on the lookout. I think this is the only safe way to expose his true self without hurting any innocent parties. If he does go off on one all he will do is take out some MP's and lets face it .. no great loss there.
     
  5. Not only is the public gallery open, but I believe there is now an extra thick sheet of perspex or similar between us and the MPs for added safety (whose safety in this case being open for debate). I'd wait for a full sitting of the House before doing this though since not only will it ensure the maximum number of MPs but the Dear Leader will be parked next to the Broon just as the mobile goes off...
     
  6. Totally agree that he must be flipped at just the right moment, as the commons are televised the carnage is sure to be caught on film for posterity. The only two problems I can see are what can be used to trigger him off and John Prescott. I am all for the ice cream van tone on the mobile but have come up with a much better plan. The gallery should be infiltrated by likeminded individuals such as myself all carrying pictures of Ice Cream cones, balloons, clowns etc. Just as he stands up to speak we hammer on the perspex and push the pictures against it, hey presto one drooling politician doing a tasmanian devil impersonation. And the more MP's drown in drool and get smacked with all the books they keep on that table the better.

    John Prescott is the main problem however, He is the only one possibly big enough to stop old Gordy once he gets going (or more likely just slow him down a bit) even more worrying is the fact that Gordon will be drooling, fat and unattractive while in Mong mode (as opposed to just fat and unattractive) and "Two Shags" may just try and bone him. We all know that John likes them fat and unattractive and I reckon the drooling may just seal the deal, and as amusing as it would be to see two politicians fcuking each other over instead of just fcuking our lives up I cant take the risk of the tape going public and traumatising and entire nation. As he likes them fat, blonde and unattractive I have arranged for Pat Butcher from Eastenders to detain him long enough to stop him attending the Commons.

    I do this to expose Gordon Brown for what he is .. and because I would dearly love to see Bliar getting twatted by a fat mong on a drool laden mission.
     
  7. Why do you think that mobiles are banned in the public gallery?

    THEY are aware of the carnage that could ensue if the wrong ring tone is set off when ....well nearly any of the mongs that work there to be honest...stand up to speak.

    You think that the fact that Fathers for justice used ballons when they protested was just a coincidence?
    Why do you think they have made protesting within 200 yds or whatever of the buildings illegal? It is just in case someone uses a megaphone with an icecream van sound track.

    Pictures of clowns and ballons will be removed from anyone trying to enter the gallery, eating of icecreams inside the building is already banned.

    All the normal forms of inducing mong madness have been thought about and banned already so we will have to think again.
     
  8. I have pointed this abberation out to my daughter a couple of years ago and she wets herself laffing when he comes on. How will our failing credibility in the world be further diminished if we see live coverage of our new PM in the back of a big flash black car with a flag on the front when the camera pans in to the rear seat with the President politely waving and on the other side, our fella licking away at the window like Jenna Jameson on another chicks rusty bullethole. Mllllaaarrrrrrr!!!
     
  9. :lol: can't say I've watched him on TV too much, but I'll make a point of looking out for this.
     
  10. ..also watch the Rory Bremmner impression of him. You can almost see the dribble. MMllaaaaar.


    Imagin his cum face 8O
     
  11. I fear that Prezza is also a mong...hence his problems with coherent speech, random acts of violence and window-licking. I may have made the bit about window licking up but he did have sex with someone who corresponds to his care worker, or "diary secretary".

    Could the balloons not be smuggled into the Strangers Gallery uninflated? Not sure about ice-cream though, unless a choc-ice could be secreted in an inside pocket packed with polystyrene? There has to be another way, possibly an England football strip? This usually over-excites the average mong and its effect on a Scottish mong can only be conjectured about. It will not be pretty that is for sure.
     
  12. !! Ewwww....that is the sort of mental image I can live without!
     
  13. Looks like the only way to get him to reveal his true self is to get another mong near him and trigger whatever the hell it is that makes them go off on one when they group together .. pack behaviour or whatever it is.

    Perhaps people just being aware of his mouths mong like behaviour after he speaks will be enough .. I have pointed this out to a couple of lads out there and they will spread the word .. he has to be stopped before becoming Prime Minister as the increased taxes to pay for all the balloons and ice creams he will distribute free .. we will be swamped by Europes mongs all looking for a 99.

    Proof of this intention are all the threating e mails from the only people in support of Gordon .. Window Cleaners and Ice Cream Van Owners.
     
  14. ViroBono

    ViroBono LE Moderator

    Watching the news on television this evening, I noticed that whilst the Dear Leader was lying at the Dispatch Box, lined up behind him were Jabba, Broon and that Beckett woman. All of them were rocking and laughing in true mong stylee whilst the Celestial Navigator drivelled on.

    Alternatively, it may be that Broon's tic is Parkinsonian in origin, which could be a side effect of anti-psychotic medication.
     
  15. He also has eyes like rat's arrseholes..