The Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, is alleged to have used the 'f word' ten times in a telephone conversation with the reptilian Keith Vaz. Good for Boris! Vaz is doing the finest job ever of being an oily, smug, smirking, self-satisfied, self-important arrsehole! He out arrseholes Hain! If I had even to think about speaking to Vaz then use of the 'f word' would be uppermost in my mind, and I don't mean: facile; fatuous; flaccid; flatulent; faeces; failed;faggot or fraudulent.