Just finished my Sunday meeting. Feeling rotten but went anyway. As someone at the meeting put it for me, you would have gone to the pub feeling like this wouldn’t you.
Was the closest ever to cracking last night at about 23:40. Stuff piling up, & while I accept MrsPlume & I won’t be getting back together (& to an extent feel freed because of this) I still think it’s a tragedy how things ended up, & more so that I don’t get to see MasterPlume.
Didn’t have a drink though. Took a lot of contemplation, but I survived & am OK now...
I know I'm stating the obvious, but it's fairly routine when an alkie puts down the booze, that the rock bottom just keeps on going down and down. It didn't feel fair to me, like here I am trying to be better, yet these kicks in the balls just keep happening.
Eventually I found myself a good solid step orientated sponsor, which was hugely helpful, if not a bit weird to start with.
Anyway, keep stacking up those sober days!