God in the dock

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by A_Brace_of_Buns, Sep 18, 2007.

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  1. Is Nebraska not part of the Bible Belt?

    So, let us assume he is granted the injunction. Who are the US Marshals going to visit to serve it and make sure it is complied with? Might I suggest Shrub, the earthly Bossman himself, apparently he claims to converse fairly regularly with God so maybe he could pass the message on!

    And if God says "Get ferked", what then? Could Allah speak to him as an equal and ask him to at least stop pratting around with the weather? If there`s any spare rain and cool breezes to be had, maybe Allah could use the opportunity to ask for some of them to come to his bailiwick?

    Could they call on Lucifer for some help? He is also supposed to be everywhere all of the time (though I have heard he is mostly to be found at MDN`s pad) so he should know where God is as well. Don`t God and Lucifer still have regular meetings to divvy up the dead souls between them - perhaps the subject could be brought up then?

    So there we are folks, the burning question of our times. How do you serve a temporary injunction on God, and then enforce it?
  2. Only in America! :roll:
  3. Bouillabaisse

    Bouillabaisse LE Book Reviewer

    You serve it on god's representative on earth, who will also be liable for the penalties if god ignores it. Interesting test of faith - if they're really his prophet then they should be queuing up to accept this. Grudge fight between the pope and the Archbish of Cant, anyone?
  4. About bloody time, thank god for Americans.

    Not sure they'll get very far with the terrorism - free will and all that - but let's see an end to all this 'weather' business.
  5. Good on him for taking the P.

    So they do have some clever politicians.
  6. Sixty

    Sixty LE Moderator Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Cyclists and Triathletes

    No contest really with the Pope's Waffen SS background.
  7. If God didn't comply with the injunction the court might order the siezure of all his assets. He's got houses everywhere and imagine the good to be done with all those churches and baubles, also funds accrued.

    It would aso do away with an awful lot of church-sponsored kiddie-fiddling - and a few wars.

    .......... GO Ernie !
  8. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Indeed. It is Gods representatives on Earth who lay down the penalties for sinning, shuch as penances, and until recently allowed paid-for 'indulgences' where one could pay to commit sin and still be absolved.

    Gods representatives in the church also collect his tythes on silver platters and hold His money for Him.

    This being the case, it should be perfectly acceptable for any judgements against God to be presented to the church, and if He fails to adhere, for the church to pay out.

    If my house is flooded, I'd like my insurance company to recoup their money from the local vicar.
  9. Ah, Biped, but you're a dirty heretic - you've broken your covenant with god - sorry, God - so surely God doesn't have a duty to refrain from pissing all over your goods and chattels? No failure to carry out a duty = no way for you to sue. Idolator.
  10. Just as well we all adhere to the Ten Commandments... wouldn't want God getting off on a mere technicality :wink:
  11. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    I certainly adhere to them, although I nearly slipped when i almost coveted a neighbours ass! :D
  12. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    A dirty heretic who has broken his covenant with God I may be, but that does not absolve Him of responsiblity for p!ssing over my goods and chatels.

    The people in power who have broken the covenant with the Armed Forces are still in power, and still answerable for that crime.

    Make the fecker pay, or make the kiddy fiddlers who represent him pay.

    Here's a question: If the church is full of kiddly-fiddlers, and they do the work of God, why didn't they try and get off by saying it was God wot done the fiddling?
  13. True - he does have form, after all - documented evidence of him knocking up a teenage virgin.
  14. Just as a precaution... you'd better start building that Ark :D
  15. Otherwise known as the 'Sutcliffe Gambit'.

    Puts organised religion in a bit of a bind, this. If they uphold their claim to represent the Almighty, they are liable: the only way to escape liability is to undermine their own legitimacy. Excellent.

    Glad I'm a Buddhist. :D