gib cook house monster

Discussion in 'Sappers' started by amazing__lobster, Mar 25, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Anyone remember her? She was howling..
  2. Yeah, went through Gib in 95 and she was there. Absolutely impossible to describe to someone who hasn't seen her with their own eyes. I well remember the big, yellow sweat circles under her arms, the moustache and sidies, the humungous belly and the thick black forearm hair. Though, suprisingly enough, I heard that she was actually quite picky. Probably had plenty of offers from lads with an eye on the pot in the guardroom but zero self-respect...:wink:
  3. what time frame are we looking at fella :?: :?:

    i do remember the two that worked in the slop-house at brompton late 80's they were sizeable :oops: :oops:
  4. She was there when I done my B3 in 98 and she was there in 2002 - she was disgusting, and I remember I once left my food because she was staring at me. Just the thought of her cooking it. I wonder if she is still there?
  5. they all need "cuddles" :roll: :roll:

  6. You didnt Knocker did you ......... did you? .... You DID didnt you! ... :lol: :lol: :lol:

    I remember one Xmas JR lunch, could have been 84/5 when one of the more presentable civvy cooks got up halfway thru the meal or was it food fight and did a turn equal to anything seen in the back room at the Two Sawyers on a Sunday afternoon 8O

    Needless to say the Badge was not ammused.... :lol: :lol: :lol:
  7. snapper wrote

    no i did not, but i know a man who did & married one of them :eek: :eek:
  8. The Monster managed to divert an entire Sexual Bananas Course from her hot plate to the other one after we watched with baited breath a large droplet of sweat run from one of her hairy armpits - down her even hairier arm - then onward down her Munster like hand - and - wait for it! .... the deciding moment that caused the en-masse diversion stampede - the said large, sweaty, minging droplet continued on its path You guessed it! right into a large pan of baked beans!!!!!

    To cap it all off I heard Approx: a year later that some gopper won the massive bet that had been built up by various courses run at Gib over the year to be presented to any sad person who actually got their end away with this Monster, the winner even had the 'Grossen Underhosen' and pics to prove the deed had been done!!!!! Noooooooooooooo!!!!!

  9. The pot thing is a load of cr*p. I can't remember constributuing towards it or ever seeing it. Last I heard she had been sacked for eating stuff straight from the hot plate. She manages to nearly burn down the small cook house at Hawley Hard in 98! She must bleed gravy.
  10. I can still vividly remember her 'tach. To people who have never seen her it sounds like an exageration, but it was dark black. Infact, it looked more like eyebrow hair, than 'tach hair.
  11. She was a man, man. Seeing her getting in and out of that small fiesta was so funny, especially because she was that large she had to sit in the back!
  12. Why can't they all be like 'Granma' at Lodge Hill? She only did the breakfasts there but she was magic :D
  13. what :!: :!: :!: :!: ....................with tricks & everything :?: :?: :?: :?:
  14. A_K_T_T_E - One day I'll post something that you don't tear apart...if it's not something about Birmingham it's picking holes in my turn of phrase! Ah well, life would be boring otherwise, eh? :D :D :D

    Northern git...
  15. wedge35 wrote

    HARSH but fair my friend..............HARSH but fair :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: