Garden Sadly Lacking

#1
I have just moved in with the future Mrs Twatty in readiness of completing my Colour Service. we have a nice plot of land to the rear of the property with ample room for the Twatty hound to crap all over, but there is a little something lacking.

I need a shed. I have no shed and I need one.

Sadly being something of a shed virgin, I have little idea of the ideal shed for me.

Can any of the Shedii give me any tips on which one I should get?

I have already ordered a greenhouse so no help needed there.
 
#5
Maddie's in the cellar/dungeon. The shed will be used for more mundane things. Storing a lawn mower perhaps and maybe a few gardening implements. The greenhouse ccannot be used for storage as it'll be full of my tomato plants, cucumbers and herb nursery.
 
#6
Maddie's in the cellar/dungeon. The shed will be used for more mundane things. Storing a lawn mower perhaps and maybe a few gardening implements. The greenhouse ccannot be used for storage as it'll be full of my tomato plants, cucumbers and herb nursery.
I call Liar. Maddie is in Zero_Over's cellar... unless... noooo.... zero_alpha is a bint Fuck me, (s)he's ugly.

edit: And, wait, you're going to marry it! You need more sheds.
 
#7
Doesn't matter what you get in the end, but remember - no matter how big your shed is, you'll wish you'd got a bigger one.
 
#8
Buying a garden implement storage facility can be gone about in two ways. One is steeped in myth and legend with many arcane rituals and strange goings on in the dark of night with pacing and whirling dervish like around at dawn during the solstice whilst drunk.

The second method is to measure how much space you have, look at how much money you want to spend and then buy the biggest one that fits both criteria.

Your choice of which you follow of course.
 
#9
I've always quiet liked the idea of having a secret underground bunker underneath a shed. From the outside it just looks like you've built the shed on a concrete plinth, but 20ft down you've got somewhere to get away from it all and smoke a pipe in your underpants and read Gardener's World it peace. No doubt after a few years, and when you start to feel confident enough, it'll turn into a rape dungeon.
 
#10
Buying a garden implement storage facility can be gone about in two ways. One is steeped in myth and legend with many arcane rituals and strange goings on in the dark of night with pacing and whirling dervish like around at dawn during the solstice whilst drunk.

The second method is to measure how much space you have, look at how much money you want to spend and then buy the biggest one that fits both criteria.

Your choice of which you follow of course.
You are wise in the ways of the Shedii. Will you take me on as your Paduan?
 
#12
Try asking AK, his house is a f*cking shed............
 
#13
Doesn't matter what you get in the end, but remember - no matter how big your shed is, you'll wish you'd got a bigger one.
This is true. So i say live in the shed and put all your shit in the house.
 
#15
I have just moved in with the future Mrs Twatty in readiness of completing my Colour Service. we have a nice plot of land to the rear of the property with ample room for the Twatty hound to crap all over, but there is a little something lacking.

I need a shed. I have no shed and I need one.

Sadly being something of a shed virgin, I have little idea of the ideal shed for me.

Can any of the Shedii give me any tips on which one I should get?

I have already ordered a greenhouse so no help needed there.
I dare say that the auto generated adverts have kicked in. If not keep this thread topical and bumped and they soon will, your ARRSE forum should be visited regular from the likes of Shed Store, Sheds Direct, Shed World... Sheds! Sheds! Sheds! Sheds! Sheds! Lovely sheds! Lovely sheds!

Just to whet your whistle:

shed-pub.jpg
 
#16
On a more serious note tho......I have a spare wooden greenhouse,you could board the windows up.......
 
#17
I've always quiet liked the idea of having a secret underground bunker underneath a shed. From the outside it just looks like you've built the shed on a concrete plinth, but 20ft down you've got somewhere to get away from it all and smoke a pipe in your underpants and read Gardener's World it peace. No doubt after a few years, and when you start to feel confident enough, it'll turn into a rape dungeon.

I have a foxes den under mine,she is keeping it safe for me in case of WW3 and the subsequent nuclear winter.........
 
#18
I suspect the shedii will not be drawn into an obvious wah thread. And OP TheIronDuke now has all your personal details from the COs. Expect a visit in the dead of night to "discuss" the "location of and your shed requirements".
 
#19
The Sh*d should be big enough for the following:

Comfortable chair
Small table to rest glasses drinking on
Storage facilities for magazines of a gentlemans choice
Connected to mains to run small fridge to keep wine, beer cool
Room to keep the Maddies of this world nice and snug for future use
 

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