Andy Farman
LE
I know of one offence, contravening good order and discipline, that raised the offender up to God-like status in the battalion before I joined, even though a half-wit would have shaken his head at the idiocy and lack of foresight.
Does anyone have any other similar stories they have heard, or witnessed?
Chelsea Barracks, 1972(?), The Major General's Inspection.
The dreaded, 'Major General's', because virtually everyone, with only three exceptions, is stood on the square to be inspected, including the battalion attached (RAC, REME etc etc).
The exceptions are the barrack guard, the post room corporal, and MRS patients too ill or injured to be moved onto the square in wheelchairs.
The inspection is invariably on the hottest day of the year, or the wettest, but there is no wet weather program for the 'Major General's', your bearskin will resemble roadkill during a monsoon, your buff belt and bayonet frog will be returned to the virgin state it was issued to you, and your scarlet, Home Service Order, tunic will be pink from the waist down on account of all the carefully applied whitening on the belt and frog having run.
To complete the visual transition from Soldiers of The Queen, to rough sleepers on a wet weekend, your steam pressed 'Trousers- Tweed-OR' will resemble water logged blankets wrapped around your legs....
...but I digress.
While virtually everyone is roasting/drowning for an hour, the Major General inspects the lines before turning his attention to the battalion and attached arms.
This is one of the few occasions when the Adjutant gets to ride a horse, and the officer in question was one of those who took delight in being a bastard.
As the Major General approached the saluting stand, the adjutant wheeled his horse about to call the parade to attention.
Behind him, in the medical centre, a window opened and a 'sniper', in pyjamas, wearing an 'S' type respirator to hide his identity, as if it could be anyone but the ONLY soldier currently confined to bed with both a leg in a cast and something infectious, took careful aim with an air rifle and shot the Adjutants horse in the arse.
Instant, airborne captain, catapulted from the nag to achieve a perfect one-point landing on his chin.
Sniper detained soon after but eventually returned from Colchester with Legend status.
Does anyone have any other similar stories they have heard, or witnessed?
Chelsea Barracks, 1972(?), The Major General's Inspection.
The dreaded, 'Major General's', because virtually everyone, with only three exceptions, is stood on the square to be inspected, including the battalion attached (RAC, REME etc etc).
The exceptions are the barrack guard, the post room corporal, and MRS patients too ill or injured to be moved onto the square in wheelchairs.
The inspection is invariably on the hottest day of the year, or the wettest, but there is no wet weather program for the 'Major General's', your bearskin will resemble roadkill during a monsoon, your buff belt and bayonet frog will be returned to the virgin state it was issued to you, and your scarlet, Home Service Order, tunic will be pink from the waist down on account of all the carefully applied whitening on the belt and frog having run.
To complete the visual transition from Soldiers of The Queen, to rough sleepers on a wet weekend, your steam pressed 'Trousers- Tweed-OR' will resemble water logged blankets wrapped around your legs....
...but I digress.
While virtually everyone is roasting/drowning for an hour, the Major General inspects the lines before turning his attention to the battalion and attached arms.
This is one of the few occasions when the Adjutant gets to ride a horse, and the officer in question was one of those who took delight in being a bastard.
As the Major General approached the saluting stand, the adjutant wheeled his horse about to call the parade to attention.
Behind him, in the medical centre, a window opened and a 'sniper', in pyjamas, wearing an 'S' type respirator to hide his identity, as if it could be anyone but the ONLY soldier currently confined to bed with both a leg in a cast and something infectious, took careful aim with an air rifle and shot the Adjutants horse in the arse.
Instant, airborne captain, catapulted from the nag to achieve a perfect one-point landing on his chin.
Sniper detained soon after but eventually returned from Colchester with Legend status.