• ARRSE have partnered with Armadillo Merino to bring you an ARRSE exclusive, generous discount offer on their full price range.
    To keep you warm with the best of Merino gear, visit www.armadillomerino.co.uk and use the code: NEWARRSE40 at the checkout to get 40% off!
    This superb deal has been generously offered to us by Armadillo Merino and is valid until midnight on the the 28th of February.

Fun/Disruption and Sabotage with Coms

#1
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
 
#3
Apart from the odd "bueller, bueller anyone anyone" over the net at peak times, one of the favourite tricks in the relays would be to mess the Sys Ops on the Switch about by waiting for them to just about gain sync and then switching our comdecs off as they were slaving :D

It probably stemmed from them giving us calls for bone information or the "it must be a problem on your truck" answer everytime the link failed at stupid o'clock in the morning, but at the time it was quite amusing to just keep turning the comdec off :D
 
#4
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
 
#5
old_n_fat said:
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
Nothing against ED's but when my 20 line/MC kept tripping and I discovered that a certain ED had been selling kettle leads on prickthroughs to div rear staff I was to say the least a little perturbed.
 
#6
old_n_fat said:
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
I once cut a German line. When the repaired it, I cut the repair out :D
 
#7
chocolate_frog said:
old_n_fat said:
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
I once cut a German line. When the repaired it, I cut the repair out :D
Mind you it was not unusual for liney to hook onto a boxhead's telephone line and allow it to be abused to ring friends and family.
 
#8
fivetodo said:
Apart from the odd "bueller, bueller anyone anyone" over the net at peak times, one of the favourite tricks in the relays would be to mess the Sys Ops on the Switch about by waiting for them to just about gain sync and then switching our comdecs off as they were slaving :D
Unfortunately, when a switch is slaving, switching the comdec out wouldn't make any difference.
The crypto sync doesn't take place until the Master engineers the link.

So there.
 
#9
Recall once setting up and then doing the "let's keep ourselves occupied on the rebro" scanning on the spare, to then discover the joy of directing minicabs around the Wiltshire area. Great fun - highly recommended!
 
#11
once_a_maverick said:
old_n_fat said:
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
Nothing against ED's but when my 20 line/MC kept tripping and I discovered that a certain ED had been selling kettle leads on prickthroughs to div rear staff I was to say the least a little perturbed.
Name and shame!
 
#12
Up the infamous 309 (Bielefeld ridge) In the days before mobile phones

The German Army were there aswell and had the Bundespost open the "grey" box and allow outgoing calls for them.
As we were due to be there for a few days I saw no harm in running out our own cable and finding a free pair to hook up to.
The whole TN knew what had been done and were using my airportable shelter as a make shift call bx because the phone was under the camp cot, everyone had rung home and we had even rang all the dirty expensive sex lines from the back pages of the **** mags...when the SSm told me the OC wanted to see me I feared the worst !! no need, he wanted to use it also...sound bloke

Bless the Bundeswehr for their generosity
 
#13
Memories of that mind numbingly boring static Ptarmigan trial thing we did in the 90's at Gutersloh on the airfield

All the Ptarmigan elements in BAOR lined up and doing some fuk wit trial for Plessey for over 3 weeks.
I was manning TN039 Node command and decided along with a few other like minded good lads to pick on one Node command and ruin his/her day by continualy phoning all their phones simultaneously whilst sending reams of shite on the printer...I remeber after about 3 days of this some little fat Sgt standing on the steps and screaming for whoever was doing it to stop.......fraid not me old son, its good fun watching someone having a breakdown lol :D
 
#14
E-Layer said:
Sat in the back of my panzer, Summer Sales '87, I thought it would be good to have some TAC i/c (red brick) fun.

I dialled 02
“int” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“int” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“INT” was the irritated response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“INT” was the really irritated response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUCKING INT” was the really pissed off response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUCK OFF” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUUUUUCK OOOFFFFFFFF” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 53
“Comms Ops, Yeoman” was the response.
“Errrrrr Hi Yoz, it’s the INT wagon, could you call me back on 02 to check the line please”

Yeoman dialled 02
“FUUUCCKKK OOFFFFFFFFFF” was the response.
You can guess the rest…..
I can see this thread becoming a classic ala "the ultimate stupid thread" thread, et al :D :dance:
 
#15
Sitting all cammed up in my Cent bridgelayer on exercise one summer in Baor, I was lucky(no question mark key on this Thai keyboard) enough to have to relay a long and boring message via the C42 set. Every time I said "roger so far, over" I got a load of verbal in a foreign accent (vot are yoo doink on ziss freqvence). Turned out to be a coastguard station in Northern Norway. They were dumbfounded when I told them I was a British tank on the Luneburger Heide ubungsplatze. (and for the intellectualy challenged security minded pedants, there was no security breach since everyone and his brother in the Russian intelligence knew that E41D was an Engineer bridgelaying AFV). (Tovarich).
 
#16
Stupid o'clock after about the Xth day of continuous rain on exercise in Outer Sh*itsville Training Area, no real sleep, running around carrying stupid loads, feeding the mossies at night and the horseflies by day, and the leeches/ticks 24/7, enduring Peacetime Army morons...

Nameless digger-"I'm bored and p!ssed off"

OA-"Unidentified callsign, identify yourself!"

Digger-"I'm not thatbored and p!ssed off"

More rantings from OA...silence otherwise...
 
#17
the_guru said:
fivetodo said:
Apart from the odd "bueller, bueller anyone anyone" over the net at peak times, one of the favourite tricks in the relays would be to mess the Sys Ops on the Switch about by waiting for them to just about gain sync and then switching our comdecs off as they were slaving :D
Unfortunately, when a switch is slaving, switching the comdec out wouldn't make any difference.
The crypto sync doesn't take place until the Master engineers the link.

So there.
Ahem, if you are sending links down the comdec to the switch via a quad or SHF, and you turn that comdec off, that switch gets sod all whatsoever, thats why you get a comdec fail and every man and his dog starts calling you to complain they have lost sync does it not ;)

Perhaps i should have been more specific?
 
#19
heidtheba said:
once_a_maverick said:
old_n_fat said:
Flagrantviolator said:
My self, I used to enjoy whistling the entirety of the theme for the Andy Griffith Show during SQ./Rgtl. radio checks in the days of PRC-25 / and 46 sets, before all this new coms witchery. Anyone else got any funny / irritating comms stories? That, and trnsmitting a loudly screamed "NO DUFF NODUFF!!" followed by dead silence. oh, the fun I had................
In days of yore in BAOR the locals were quite adept at cutting field phone cables. That wasn't too bad as they were quickly repaired, that is until they discovered cutting twenty feet out of the cable was much more effective. Another jolly jape by the locals was to hammer panel pins through ten pair cables which caused shorts which were an absolute barsteward to find and repair.
Nothing against ED's but when my 20 line/MC kept tripping and I discovered that a certain ED had been selling kettle leads on prickthroughs to div rear staff I was to say the least a little perturbed.
Name and shame!
Little fat insignificant fella I cant remember his name. Det commander was Taff Con***. Also on the same det was Dai*y D*y

Edited to add, just remembered surname was wright
 
#20
E-Layer said:
Sat in the back of my panzer, Summer Sales '87, I thought it would be good to have some TAC i/c (red brick) fun.

I dialled 02
“int” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“int” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“INT” was the irritated response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“INT” was the really irritated response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUCKING INT” was the really pissed off response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUCK OFF” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 02
“FUUUUUCK OOOFFFFFFFF” was the response.
I cleared down.

I dialled 53
“Comms Ops, Yeoman” was the response.
“Errrrrr Hi Yoz, it’s the INT wagon, could you call me back on 02 to check the line please”

Yeoman dialled 02
“FUUUCCKKK OOFFFFFFFFFF” was the response.
You can guess the rest…..

Nice one. Just Laughed so much a little bit of wee came out...... :oops:
 

Latest Threads