Friday Joke

#1
Yes I know its not Friday but here goes:

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area. Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn, I wish I was a shark, then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."
A large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted", and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it invariably does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely.
All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight. While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn.

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn. With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail. (The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realised he couldn't see his old pal. "Where's Christian?" he asked.
"He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark", came the reply.
Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's abode.

As he opened the coral gate memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again."
Christian replied, "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner."
Justin cried back "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.".....................
wait for it.....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Christian"
BOOM BOOM!!!
And Goodnight!

Have to say was nicked from a mate on another website. Standing by with Bin Lid on awaiting the incoming.
 
#3
There are jokes so bad that they transcend badness and become elevated to a higher plane. This nearly gets there. As a fan of the ohmygod icantbelievethat itssuchabadjoke school I applaud you sir!
 
#5
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the
difference between potentially and realistically?"



The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she
would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if
she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your
brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and
tell me what you learn from that."



So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for
a million dollars?"



His mother replied, "Of course I would! We could really use that money to
fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!"



The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt
for a million dollars?"



The girl replied, "Oh my God! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a
heartbeat, are you nuts???"



The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt
for a million dollars?"



"Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks
would buy?"



The boy pondered the answers for a few days, then went back to his dad.



His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between potentially
and realistically?"



The boy replied, "Yes I have. Potentially, you and I are sitting on three
million dollars. But realistically, we're living with two sluts and a
queer."
 

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