French jokes

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by craigspeedy, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Q: did you hear about the french rifle for sale from the second world war?
    A: Never fired only dropped once.

    Q: How do you get a French waiter's attention?
    A: Start ordering in German

    Q. How do you stop a French tank?
    A. Say "boo"

    I got a tip for you , if you install the french versions of your favorite programs, THEY RUN A LOT FASTER

    Why do the french get more votes in the U.N. They vote with both hands

    What is the french peoples favorite movie? the running man

    Q. How do you confuse a French Soldier?
    A. Give him a rifle and ask him to shoot it.

    Q. Why don't Master Card and Visa work well in France
    A.They do not know how to say "CHARGE!"

    Did you hear that the Post Office had to recall its series of stamps depicting famous Frenchmen? People were confused about which side to spit on.

    Why do the French never perform �the wave� at a soccer game? Because, that's a gesture reserved for use only in time of war

    What's the shortest book ever written? French War Heroes

    Why did the French celebrate their World Cup Championship in 2000 so wildly? It was their first time they won anything without the help of the U.S.

    Going to war without the French on your side is like going hunting without an accordian.

    Why is good to be french? You can surender at the begining of the war, and US and British will win it for you

    Why do we need France on our side against Sadamm and Osama? So the French can show them how to surrender.

    Q. How many frenchman does it take to gaurd Paris?
    A. Nobody knows, its never been tried before

    What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? The Army

    Q. What did France used to be called?
    A. Germany, and then we saved them.

    Q. How do you sink a French battleship?
    A. Put it in water.

    Q. Did you hear bout the French Kamikaze?
    A. He flew 30 successful missions

    Q. Did you hear about England's new zoo?
    A. They put a fence around France