Forum sterotypes

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by contact_wait_out, Aug 17, 2011.

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  1. Have seen the platoon sterotypes thread so thought this might also be appropiate to post.

    The Internet Hardman-Constantly throwing around virtual threats "I will punch your teeth down the back of your throat" "I will destroy your family" More than likley not very hard at all, infact quite the opposite. Likley to be a 9 stone piss wet through SNCO who likes to reinstall his virtual ego as he auctually has no real freinds.

    The everso too helpful guy-Always bright and cheery even if he has being told to go and dig a grave and die. Offers alot of help, especially to the younger members. Offers to meet up and share storys, although he is more interested in a quick grope.

    Kit mainiac-Always posts in the QM forums. Is subscribed to every military magazine avaible. Although he is no longer serving he is still to most up to date on military equipment and clothing. Most commonly posts on the forums while wearing an old 95 smock and drinking rat pack tea from a '58 mug.

    Internet Chav-Posts in the recruiting forums with threads like "whatz da 1.5mile times nowadayz" and "I cant pass da barb testz shud I go infantry" Comes from a deprived area in Manchester and accesses the internet from the local cafe for £1 for 60 minutes.

    Been there done it all-In his 60's served a short stint back in the late 70's with the ACC. Constantly comments on posts reminding everyone how easy the Army is nowadays and how back in his day you didn't go home at the weekend but stayed behind and painted the grass. Posts a wierd picture of himself with a thick tash in the Gallery which after a number of pisstaking comments he takes down as he didn't get the "God your ally" comments he expected.

    The civvy chopper-His colourful military career streches as far back as Nottingham AFCO when he picked up a leaflet from there in 2005. Has being a member of the forum for a number of years and constantly comments about how he wish he had joined but couldn't because he had to look after his cat. Thinks because he has being a member of the forum for a number of years he can gob of to serving soldiers, then when asked about his career immediately goes offline and dosn't reappear for a couple of days. Usually in his 30's and spends at least 12 hours online a day. Masturbates heavily while listening to Bon Jovi.
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  2. Pervert: makes up 99.9% of ARRSE's membership, no matter what form of sexual depravity you want advice in at least one member has partaken in it
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  3. You've missed the lurker...........

    Damm I've just blown my cover.....
  4. You forgot the ever present SCH's!
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  5. Thread Killers

    (Types that paste internet links to sites that have all the answers to the question!)
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  6. The Glutton for Punishment - Always ends up getting abused and ridiculed, but always tries to get the last word. Usually ends up moving to another thread for the whole sordid process to repeat itself.

    FORMER_FYRDMAN LE Book Reviewer

    The Golden Rivet Refugees - generally short-tempered monomaniacs who, having escaped from the apocalypse which engulfed Rum Ration, range the forums, lobbying tirelessly for CVF and Sea Harriers whilst creating ever more fanciful scenarios for Argentine domination of the Falklands, until the MODS corral them and escort them back to the reservation. They also say 'galley' and 'ladders' when they mean 'kitchen' and 'stairs'.
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  8. Grumblegrunt

    Grumblegrunt LE Book Reviewer

    not if you dont agree with the link which was pretty lame

    cant find the clip from the end without signing in and shit like that
  9. Like those that can't spell like.
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  10. Please don't hate me.

    FORMER_FYRDMAN LE Book Reviewer

    Spelling Nazis
  12. The Spelling Nazi!

    Attached Files:

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  13. It's OK I don't hate you, pity you yes.
  14. the shocker

    comes out with outlandish comments that they couldn't possibly agree with in real life, to try to make themselves look edgy and sick or funny on the internet