Forgive her. Shes a woolyback.

#1
Mrs Puttees hails from deepest, darkest Northumberland, from a small town on the outskirts of Otterburn Training Area which was probably known to the Roman invaders as "Uno Equus."

Anyway, during a conversation today....

Mrs Puttees: You know, when you're using the SatNav...

Puttees: Yes...

Mrs Puttees: .... and you're using it abroad....

Puttees: Yes.... (I just knew I was in for a treat - wifey is NOT technically-minded)

Mrs Puttees: Well, does it still speak to you in English?


Now I know why we've got so many asylum seekers in Britain. Can anybody recommend a good asylum? For me or the wife. I'm not fussed.
 
#2
Just choked on me pastie

Bad a s my wife ringing me at work to say she was trying to send me a fax, but it wouldn't send as it just kept spitting the paper back out the bottom
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#3
putteesinmyhands said:
Mrs Puttees hails from deepest, darkest Northumberland, from a small town on the outskirts of Otterburn Training Area which was probably known to the Roman invaders as "Uno Equus."
Woolyback is a term employed by Scousers to describe denizens of St. Helens.

Northumbrians should be addressed as Master, Mistress, Dear Leader, Beloved Leader, Highnness, Your Sublimity and like that, you pig ignorant Southern oaf.

Carry on.
 
#4
TheIronDuke said:
putteesinmyhands said:
Mrs Puttees hails from deepest, darkest Northumberland, from a small town on the outskirts of Otterburn Training Area which was probably known to the Roman invaders as "Uno Equus."
Woolyback is a term employed by Scousers to describe denizens of St. Helens.

Northumbrians should be addressed as Master, Mistress, Dear Leader, Beloved Leader, Highnness, Your Sublimity and like that, you pig ignorant Southern oaf.

Carry on.
Nope thats those from Durham :wink:
 
#5
TheIronDuke said:
putteesinmyhands said:
Mrs Puttees hails from deepest, darkest Northumberland, from a small town on the outskirts of Otterburn Training Area which was probably known to the Roman invaders as "Uno Equus."
Woolyback is a term employed by Scousers to describe denizens of St. Helens.

Northumbrians should be addressed as Master, Mistress, Dear Leader, Beloved Leader, Highnness, Your Sublimity and like that, you pig ignorant Southern oaf.

Carry on.
No,No,No
A Woolyback aka a Sheep Shagg,er is anyone who lives out in the sticks, or it does round Teesside, which is in the North East not daaan saaarrff!! IronDuke
Nice one Puttees :D
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#6
TheHatsRevenge said:
TheIronDuke said:
putteesinmyhands said:
Mrs Puttees hails from deepest, darkest Northumberland, from a small town on the outskirts of Otterburn Training Area which was probably known to the Roman invaders as "Uno Equus."
Woolyback is a term employed by Scousers to describe denizens of St. Helens.

Northumbrians should be addressed as Master, Mistress, Dear Leader, Beloved Leader, Highnness, Your Sublimity and like that, you pig ignorant Southern oaf.

Carry on.
No,No,No
A Woolyback aka a Sheep Shagg,er is anyone who lives out in the sticks, or it does round Teesside, which is in the North East not daaan saaarrff!! IronDuke
Nice one Puttees :D
In that case my wife is a woolyback because her family come from Yorkshire and they are noted sheep shaggers down there.

My favourite among many? Spotting an ambulance going down our lane..."Why is ambulance?"

Kept me awake all night that did. I am still unable to provide a satisfactory answer.
 
#8
sevensixtwo said:
The ex thought that when she was using google earth she had real time control of the satalite.
Let me know when she has finished with it.

My turn next.
 
#9
Your tale reminds me of that classic Northumbrian folk song played by a hind on the pipes entitled. "I married the range wardens daughter"
 

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