Football Shirts - Chav or Not?

#1
Now, on the odd occasion when my beige, yellow and mauve diamond patterned tank-top is in the wash I will don my claret and blue West Ham shirt and wear it out and about over jeans and trainers looking the dogs gonads. Since I look the biz' and nails amongst the far too many faggoty, dole scrounging Liverpooh tops I see floating about I do not considser myself chav. Just fcuking Godlike.

However, today in the country park there was a 30 something husband and father of two wearing one of those puke dayglo' Chelsea away strips. On par with me so far, OK. But what the fcuk was the matching Chelsea shorts AND socks and white trainers FFS? Yeah, a full strip. He was swaggering about like he was about to come on for Frank Lampard the stupid pr1ck. Is this bloke chav or just a nonse? Should I have taken him out with a surprise tackle from behind with all the hundreds of onlooking kids?
 
#2
Ponce!

Football attire of anysort is puffy, unless its boots on the dancefloor of Slys.

The only sporting equipment that should be allowed to be worn with civilian / normal clothing is a wetsuit and crampons. Anything else you might as well let Liberace feast on your anus
 
#4
Full kit? Awful on anyone above the age of 8. Shirt alone, tolerable, but preferably just the home strip- hardly any team in the UK has an away shirt than anyone would want to be seen wearing if they were not on the pitch playing with the rest of the team, after all.

To be fair though, Chelsea strips- home or away- will always look puke inducing by default. Funnily enough, same can be said for Hammers...

;)
 
#5
Agree with mdn. Football shirts are the ultimate in chavness.

Its an item of sports kit ffs.

What makes me laugh is seeing people out and about wearing their 'smart football shirt' for special occasions.

Chav, chav, chav. Simple as that.
 

maninblack

LE
Book Reviewer
#6
Football strip away from a game of football (participating not eating pies and cheering) is a sure sign of low intelligence, a small pork sword and that your wife is letting better endowed men plow her fetid puckered porthole with their splendidly veiny pole.
 
#7
Gotta agree even sadder when you see them tied to a railing covered in dirty exhaust fumes and 3 month old dead flowers just because some spastic ned/chav was tanked up on white lighting and staggered into a car...Darwinism in action!
 
B

blindfire

Guest
#8
maninblack said:
Football strip away from a game of football (participating not eating pies and cheering) is a sure sign of low intelligence, a small pork sword and that your wife is letting better endowed men plow her fetid puckered porthole with their splendidly veiny pole.
unless of course it is a Tottenham shirt :D then you are cool as fcuk
 
#9
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
Agree with mdn. Football shirts are the ultimate in chavness.

Its an item of sports kit ffs.

What makes me laugh is seeing people out and about wearing their 'smart football shirt' for special occasions.

Chav, chav, chav. Simple as that.
I'm in Glasgow at the moment, and it is not uncommon to see the locals going out and about their business not only in their best going out in shirt, but also their best going out in matching tracksuit too. I have seen the trainers that match, but they are thankfully rare.
 
#10
maninblack said:
a small pork sword and that your wife is letting better endowed men plow her fetid puckered porthole with their splendidly veiny pole.
I always miss the obvious. I'd never thought of it that way before. Thanks.
 
#11
ohh bollocks.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..
 
#13
NoSurrender73 said:
ohh balls.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..

Not being a fat sweaty kissball shirt wearing chav will aid in not getting sweaty too.
 
#14
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
ohh balls.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..

Not being a fat sweaty kissball shirt wearing chav will aid in not getting sweaty too.
I'm fairly skinny. Football shirt material is alot better than a normal t-shirt.
 
#15
blindfire said:
maninblack said:
Football strip away from a game of football (participating not eating pies and cheering) is a sure sign of low intelligence, a small pork sword and that your wife is letting better endowed men plow her fetid puckered porthole with their splendidly veiny pole.
unless of course it is a Tottenham shirt :D then you are cool as fcuk
For Spurs fans shouldn't that be a "kosher meat sword" ?

What about rugby shirts? I mean the classic 'Cotton Traders' variety.
 
#16
Ah-hem, I should mention I don't wear my top out any more unless it's to the DIY yard to pick up dirty heavy sh1t or in the garden digging holes to throw dead Millwall and Spurs fans. Garden's looking Teletubby lanscaped at the mo'. My son now wears West Ham home top (fcuk Bolton and Sunderland tops the wifeoid bought for him recently :evil: ), and now he's the nailest kid on the street.
 
#17
NoSurrender73 said:
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
ohh balls.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..

Not being a fat sweaty kissball shirt wearing chav will aid in not getting sweaty too.
I'm fairly skinny. Football shirt material is alot better than a normal t-shirt.

So buy a normal T shirt made out of kissball shirt material. Saves you looking like a retard chav and will no doubt be a quarter of the price.

The last time I wore a football shirt was when I was 11 years old. It just doesnt seem appropriate for a grown up to wear one if he is not actually playing football.

In a similar vein, I dispise those stupid little fucking footy shirts you see hanging in the back window of a car. Although they have their uses. It indicates that the driver has an IQ lower than the national speed limit.
 
#18
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
ohh balls.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..

Not being a fat sweaty kissball shirt wearing chav will aid in not getting sweaty too.
I'm fairly skinny. Football shirt material is alot better than a normal t-shirt.

So buy a normal T shirt made out of kissball shirt material. Saves you looking like a retard chav and will no doubt be a quarter of the price.

The last time I wore a football shirt was when I was 11 years old. It just doesnt seem appropriate for a grown up to wear one if he is not actually playing football.

In a similar vein, I dispise those stupid little * footy shirts you see hanging in the back window of a car. Although they have their uses. It indicates that the driver has an IQ lower than the national speed limit.
They on a par with those "Baby on board" signs. Most people believe they are there to alert road users to slow down,because they've got a bundle of sh*t and snot on board,as opposed to their actual intention which is to let the emergency services know (in the event of an RTA) there's a sprog in the vehicle.
 
#19
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
The-Lord-Flasheart said:
NoSurrender73 said:
ohh balls.. I quite often wear a Rangers home shirt :(

To be honest on a warm day a football shirt is probably the best because its light and doesn't make you sweaty..

Not being a fat sweaty kissball shirt wearing chav will aid in not getting sweaty too.
I'm fairly skinny. Football shirt material is alot better than a normal t-shirt.

So buy a normal T shirt made out of kissball shirt material. Saves you looking like a retard chav and will no doubt be a quarter of the price.

The last time I wore a football shirt was when I was 11 years old. It just doesnt seem appropriate for a grown up to wear one if he is not actually playing football.

In a similar vein, I dispise those stupid little fucking footy shirts you see hanging in the back window of a car. Although they have their uses. It indicates that the driver has an IQ lower than the national speed limit.
What uses :?
 
#20
The 'baby on board' (or 'humourous' variations of) sign are an indication that the occupants should be sterilised. Used in conjunction with the mini footy shirt just means I will try my hardest to ram you off the fcuking road.
 

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