Food poisoning - or is it?

If it's anything like what I got from raw chicken several years ago:

it will go away by itself after a few days
dilute squash is your friend, not fizzy drinks (flat coke was recommended, I forgot about the flat bit)
do NOT under any circumstances trust a fart
 
Better you top yourself before the really bad stuff starts. This is only the precursor to an avalanche of shit accompanied by excruciating pain.
 

morsk

LE
Shit yourself thin
 

Yokel

LE
Where on Earth would I have got that?

I had lots of things to do today, but have been unable to concentrate on anything. Perhaps I will feel better tommorow?

I have tried eating a little bit.
 

StBob072

LE
Book Reviewer
Norovirus? All the signs are there ...
 
get some Vaseline for your ragged ********. It both soothes and makes cleanup easier.

learnt that during the terror of the reheated goujon.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Could be unrelated to food, could have picked up norovirus (Winter vomiting disease)

If you are not 48 hours clear of D&V by health appointment then phone and check they would still want you to attend.

Can't have sick folk turning up at hospitals you know!
 

ACAB

LE
Nah, it's ARRSEs first recorded Coronavirus.

Hail To the King!!!!!
 
get some Vaseline for your ragged ********. It both soothes and makes cleanup easier.

learnt that during the terror of the reheated goujon.
Would Vick's Vapour rub work better I wonder. That menthol thing has a nice cooling effect when I use it to sooth a sore throat.

If not then maybe Deep Heat or chilli paste come pepper spray.
 
Would Vick's Vapour rub work better I wonder. That menthol thing has a nice cooling effect when I use it to sooth a sore throat.

If not then maybe Deep Heat or chilli paste come pepper spray.
I mistakenly deployed an antiseptic wetwipe once in the belief that it had said antibacterial on the packet.

I noticed the difference.
 
I mistakenly deployed and antiseptic wetwipe once in the belief that it had said antibacterial on the packet.

I noticed the difference.
Hygene before everything I say, except when it comes to Izal, forget that.

There's a few other bits and pieces here that might help too.

 
Maybe you've got the ghey.

There is a lot of it about
 

Yokel

LE
Could be unrelated to food, could have picked up norovirus (Winter vomiting disease)

If you are not 48 hours clear of D&V by health appointment then phone and check they would still want you to attend.

Can't have sick folk turning up at hospitals you know!
Hmm yes. I have a hospital appointment on Monday morning. I kind of need to attend it. I feel awful. Oh and now I have headache and shivers.

But I think I am over the worst now. I am still alive anyway.
 
Dosen't need to be food, you could have picked it up from a door handle or something an infected person touched....you minging barsteward you.
 

Daxx

MIA
Book Reviewer
Forget water, drink whiskey, tastes much nicer.
 

Yokel

LE
I once regularly saw someone who I think had OCD. When she opened a door it was with copious amounts of tissues. I think she may have had a point.

I was so appalled a few years back when I saw someone not washing his hands in a shopping centre toilets that I started a thread.
 

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