Whats your best following through story? Don't be ashamed, let it out (down either leg) Since drinking my first bottle of Strongbow at 14, i've been a victim of the booze induced squitters. Anyone else? For me, it would usually be whilst I was at the bar getting the beers in. In that lovely moment immediately after the landlord had taken my order, i'd relax and treat myself to a trump, knowing that it would disperse by the time I got back to the table with my beer. Despite considering myself an Olympic standard farter, i'd get caught out every now and again, and jettison an eggcupful of liquid gold into me trolleys. Never enough to make me go home, but enough to make me stink of sh*t for the rest of the evening. When I left the forces, I thought i'd leave my dirty-gruds past behind me, (usually in the pub car park). But no. I was walking into town about two years ago to meet up with a mate who'd just got back from Bosnatraz. I'd drank a lot of Guinness the night before but didn't think I had any cause for concern, until I was about ten minutes from the pub. I got a brief pain in my stomach, and within 15 seconds was joining the Involuntary Defecation Display Team. There was at least a kidney pouch full down each leg of me trousers. My undercrackers had performed some basic filtration keeping the bigger bits close to my hoop. I sh*tty-walked all the way back home, and dumped all my clobber into the wheelie bin, before quickly getting scrubbed up and putting some fresh clothes on. I rang my mate to let him know i'd be half an hour late and told him the reason. He was very understanding and stated that he'd had a similar misfortune only the week before. Does anybody else have any amusing "Oh look, i'm covered in my own shite, perhaps i'm an alcoholic", stories???