Fight Club

#1
Having taken a punch in the nose recently, which didn't actually hurt but made my face look as if I'd just been eating out an elephant on the blob, it got me thinking about great fights of time gone by.

My personal favourite involved a lad I knew gobbing off in the kebab house, swiftly followed by a 30-40 man mass brawl that left the kebab house looking as if it had been established in Hiroshima, circa 1945.

We never mean to start the fights, they just happen!

Any reminiscences of impromptu fight-club antics from the ARRSE membership? Extra points for on the Taxi rank or outside the kebab house!

(This has probably been done before, but I thought that it was about time that we got back to talking about drinking, fighting and shagging in the NAAFI Bar)
 
#2
At Bruggen in,oh around 88ish,the RE were posted in for airfield repair.Now at that time the Rocks thought they were gods gift to the female population & could be found collectivly as a group in the Crossbow Club bop.
I remember one night we were in there & the RE came in.Silence descended,a bottle was thrown & then all hell broke loose!
After about 10 minutes of ground being gained & lost by both sides,some WRAF's even got stuck in defending their Rock Ape boyfriends, it spiled outside,where the RAF Police were waiting.
Now by this time we had gotten the f*ck offside & out the side enterance as this was a Rock V RE scrap & nothing to do with us..
Apparently one of the RAF Police dogs got bitten on the nose by someone!
 
#4
I remember a good scrap in the battle group bar in BATUS 2001. It started off with some friendly singing. Then somebody lobbed a can at one of the most popular members of the Sqn. There was an under strength armoured engineer squadrn, part of the HQ sqn and a troop attatched from 20 Sqn. We all took it as slight and waded in!

I was out with my brother and a mate (who happened to be a Regt boxing champion) one night in my home town (think Amesbury but moved 140 miles north west). This one kn0bber kept on staring at us and my mate got threaders with this and went over and asked pleb boy and his mates:

"what the fcuk is your problem?"
"no problem with you, just those two" obviously refering to my brother and I
"well if you've got a problem with them you've got a problem with me. So I'll see you and as many of your pussy mates as you can muster in 5 minutes outside!"

Strangely enough after that night my brother or I have never had a sniff of bother.
 
#5
The Oktoberfest mass brawl in Wainright Camp, Canada 1991. 250+ civvies, Canadian soldiers and dignataries versus 250+ British squaddies. All started by an innocent stumble by one of the lads into a lumberjack lookalike. Knew it was getting bad when I spied a trim looking lass in a fetching two-piece and high heels smashing a tray into one of the lads faces.

RCMP were even getting battered. In the dental centre the next morning (I slipped in the shower Guv) there was a queue going out the door. Two days later one of the lads found a 3" piece of gum with teeth still attached stuck on the road through camp.
 
#7
Christmas Eve 1986, Previews Bar in Gibraltar. Elements of Tangier and Holland Company, 1 Queens mostly young privates, ended up in a mass brawl with about 50 locals.

It was like a western, bodies going through windows, bar stools being swung around heads..

One of the locals goes over on he floor and cracks his head open. Because of the beer on the floor, the blood spreads like a river.

"'e's been killed!"

We bomb burst and leg it. I end up a group of about 6 and we go around the back streets and head straight for the Coach & Horses in Main Street and get a beer.

Next thing, one of the other lads comes running up the stairs completely covered in pink hair spray.

"It's kicking off in the street!"

We dive out just as the civvy old bill arrived. The spicks had ambushed about 10 of our guys in the main street and given them a bit of a pasting. For some bizarre reason, everyone was covered in this coloured hair spray. They'd obviously acquired them and were using them as weapons.

As bizzare were the ranks of Japanese tourists videoing the action on their suitcase sized video cameras.

About 8 blokes got nicked and each got a £10 fine.

No one was hurt seriously.

Around 1994/95, The Black Watch were based in Pirbright. Although I was out by then, I knew a few fellas so would often go on the piss with them.

For some reason I can't remember, Combat 18 decided they wanted a piece of them. About 40 or so pile off the train at Brookwood and pile into the Brookwood Hotel Pool room and set about a load of young jocks.

Whilst it seemed clear they had done a recce they clearly hadn't done a proper recce as the other room contained at least 100 jocks screaming at the Rangers Celtic game in the other room.

Blood bath doesn't even come close. Civvy old bill just stand and watch until the lads get bored and then arrest all the Combat 18 muppets and not a single troop.
 
#8
I don't start fights in the street, i finish them :wink:
 
#9
thinkingaboutit said:
Christmas Eve 1986, Previews Bar in Gibraltar. Elements of Tangier and Holland Company, 1 Queens mostly young privates, ended up in a mass brawl with about 50 locals.

It was like a western, bodies going through windows, bar stools being swung around heads..

One of the locals goes over on he floor and cracks his head open. Because of the beer on the floor, the blood spreads like a river.

"'e's been killed!"

We bomb burst and leg it. I end up a group of about 6 and we go around the back streets and head straight for the Coach & Horses in Main Street and get a beer.

Next thing, one of the other lads comes running up the stairs completely covered in pink hair spray.

"It's kicking off in the street!"

We dive out just as the civvy old bill arrived. The spicks had ambushed about 10 of our guys in the main street and given them a bit of a pasting. For some bizarre reason, everyone was covered in this coloured hair spray. They'd obviously acquired them and were using them as weapons.

As bizzare were the ranks of Japanese tourists videoing the action on their suitcase sized video cameras.

About 8 blokes got nicked and each got a £10 fine.

No one was hurt seriously.

Around 1994/95, The Black Watch were based in Pirbright. Although I was out by then, I knew a few fellas so would often go on the urine with them.

For some reason I can't remember, Combat 18 decided they wanted a piece of them. About 40 or so pile off the train at Brookwood and pile into the Brookwood Hotel Pool room and set about a load of young jocks.

Whilst it seemed clear they had done a recce they clearly hadn't done a proper recce as the other room contained at least 100 jocks screaming at the Rangers Celtic game in the other room.

Blood bath doesn't even come close. Civvy old bill just stand and watch until the lads get bored and then arrest all the Combat 18 muppets and not a single troop
.
Quality! LMAO. :rofl:
 
#10
Bali in Braunschweig, just a normal night, till these boxheads chase a lad in and set about him, so it all kicks off, turns out the boxheads were undercover coppers, cue lots of uniformed with batons, real wild west night.

Those who knew the Bali, will know how close the main cop shop is, cue lots of their reinforcements. Papers said we put 8 in hospital including a inspector or equivalant. Great till i was arrested and told i was looking at 5 years in a kraut nick, we all had a drink to the German lawyer who stopped the court case before it got silly.
 
#11
Sandy_The_Guvnor said:
I don't start fights in the street, i finish them :wink:
Isnt it about time you did some fighting in Afghanistan? Stay any longer at depot and people will think your only their for the sweet young ass.
 
#13
Wasnt there a load of dawn raids against Combat 18 a few years back and a couple of the lads nicked were serving Paras?
 
#14
Between 1998 and 2000, dozens of Combat 18 members in the UK were arrested on various charges during dawn raids by the police. These raids were part of several operations conducted by Scotland Yard in co-operation with MI5. Those arrested included Steve Sargent (brother of Charlie Sargent), David Myatt, and two serving British soldiers, Darren Theron (Parachute Regiment) and Carl Wilson (1st Battalion, The Queen's Lancashire Regiment).
just found this on Wiki
 
#15
You'll never catch me fighting.





























I've learn't my lesson and leg it just as the Police arrive.
 
#17
Bogtejebo said:
Barrack Room Lawyer said:
Wasnt there a load of dawn raids against Combat 18 a few years back and a couple of the lads nicked were serving Paras?
Well, that's killed the thread a bit.
Sorry about that, until I posted that there were after all 11 posts made in 26 hours. :roll:
 
#18
Ahhh for fucks sake, you can't blame a man for trying!

Many years ago, me and a friend were set upon by a group of lads who didn't take kindly to the language and gestures we were using towards one of their female relatives. Fight ensues, few loose railings, one lad has claret all over his bonce after spanking it off the wall of the nearby shops, and the flashing blue lights turn up. Everyone bomb bursts, me and my mate running into an under construction housing estate. All the houses were built, just being fitted out. Flashing blue lights were dealing with some of the lads from the other group they'd caught, so we seemed home and dry. Well, we were almost away, in the way between us and the main drag home was a wall, so we both jumped the cunt.

My mate went first.

What was in fact a 3 foot wall on our side was about a 12 foot drop on the other side, and he went over like a ski jumper, albeit covered in claret and stinking of lager. I heard a scream that slowly dropped away, so checked my run so I could drop down safely. The image of that silly twat lying on the floor screaming was funny as fuck! Even if I did have to carry the silly fecker home!

Luckily it was only ligament damage, he didn't break the ankle, but how the police didn't manage to ping one man, giving another a piggy back, and both looking like they'd been at the tomato throwing thing in Spain I will never know!
 

BrunoNoMedals

LE
Kit Reviewer
#19
Out on the lash with a couple of Slimey mates, and I'm the only civvy left. It's kicking-out time at the club, but nothing kicking off until some smarmy cnut feels the need to shove one of the lads (the smallest - easier to get away with, he thought) out of his way so he can get past. Cue a first grip around the arm, spinning the lad around so he's standing chest to face with mini-Slime who promptly gives him a "dressing down".

Obviously assuming he's got the upper hand, cnut-chops starts towering over my mate screaming the usual "who the fcuk do you think you're talking to?" rubbish. Nissed as a pewt, matey starts giving him his best reverse psychology and being so calm and logical that it was starting to annoy even me. The chav, however, was getting thoroughly riled. I'd got myself nice and close, in case anything was tried, but was having plenty of fun listening to this guy getting utterly demeaned. Still i figured it was getting close to breaking point so I gave t'other mate a nudge on the shoulder (feeling quite bad about distracting him from the two pieces of ass he was working on) and informed him that he may be needed - him being the biggest and me being arrseholed and weak.

Second mate excuses himself from the ladies, walks up to chav (who's looking a little confused at the thing in front of him with the cheek to point a finger pretty much up his nose), turns him round and, without breaking stride or even introducing himself, lands a headbutt firmly on the charver's nose. Claret everywhere, the lad hits the deck.

At this point the bouncers come over and ask, extremely politely, if we wouldn't mind taking it around the corner. When the cnut has finally been picked up by a few mates, they follow behind. The three of us all face up, but strangely they'd gone all diplomatic on us. Since we needed a taxi, we were quite happy to walk away there and then, but cnut-chops decides to play his ace: "Do you know who my dad is?"

Well that was it. No one over the age of 12 should ever have to pull out that little line, and we made sure he knew we really didn't give a fcuk. We had to stop, however, when his missus came over squealing, then fell in a muddy puddle and started rolling around making weird sounds. It completely freaked us out, strange bint that she was.
 
#20
Praetorian said:
Ahhh for fucks sake, you can't blame a man for trying!

Many years ago, me and a friend were set upon by a group of lads who didn't take kindly to the language and gestures we were using towards one of their female relatives. Fight ensues, few loose railings, one lad has claret all over his bonce after spanking it off the wall of the nearby shops, and the flashing blue lights turn up. Everyone bomb bursts, me and my mate running into an under construction housing estate. All the houses were built, just being fitted out. Flashing blue lights were dealing with some of the lads from the other group they'd caught, so we seemed home and dry. Well, we were almost away, in the way between us and the main drag home was a wall, so we both jumped the cunt.

My mate went first.

What was in fact a 3 foot wall on our side was about a 12 foot drop on the other side, and he went over like a ski jumper, albeit covered in claret and stinking of lager. I heard a scream that slowly dropped away, so checked my run so I could drop down safely. The image of that silly t**t lying on the floor screaming was funny as fuck! Even if I did have to carry the silly fecker home!

Luckily it was only ligament damage, he didn't break the ankle, but how the police didn't manage to ping one man, giving another a piggy back, and both looking like they'd been at the tomato throwing thing in Spain I will never know!
Im sorry, you clearly seem to think you are an extra in Snatch. Please retype, a little less like a mockney twat.

Thankyou.
 

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