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fell out with my best mate because of arrse!

#1
i had a houseparty on friday night to celebrate me going off to catterick.

my mate brings this stuck up silver spooned slapper who then gives me a pasting on why being in the army is wrong, how that makes me a murderer, how im abandoning my daughter and finally how i should get a "proper job"

i then proceeded to tell her that "daddy" isnt a high flyer in the city and cant afford to sub me all my life like her,
that im joining the army for the good of my daughter, and reminded her of the fact i and many other fine fellows such as your selves fight for eachother not the oil hungry PM . soldiers dont choose where they go.

mate got all defensive i then told him hes a cnut and to get the little scrubber out of the house etc.

just thought id share, that these are the poncy folk we are meant to be "protecting"
 
#2
private---pile said:
ijust thought id share, that these are the poncy folk we are meant to be "protecting"
You aren't protecting anyone yet. You're stiill technically a civvy. Oh, by the way, I think the story you just posted is a load of made-up shite.
 
#4
private---pile said:
i had a houseparty on friday night to celebrate me going off to catterick.

my mate brings this stuck up silver spooned slapper who then gives me a pasting on why being in the army is wrong, how that makes me a murderer, how im abandoning my daughter and finally how i should get a "proper job"

i then proceeded to tell her that "daddy" isnt a high flyer in the city and cant afford to sub me all my life like her,
that im joining the army for the good of my daughter, and reminded her of the fact i and many other fine fellows such as your selves fight for eachother not the oil hungry PM . soldiers dont choose where they go.

mate got all defensive i then told him hes a cnut and to get the little scrubber out of the house etc.

just thought id share, that these are the poncy folk we are meant to be "protecting"
Old men make the wars, young men fight them.

Don't think you're alone on this
 

B_AND_T

MIA
Book Reviewer
#9
Many years ago I was at my sisters wedding, dressed in No2's. Her husband is American and had invited friends and family over from Noo Yoik.

Everything was going fine until I was approached by this deranged yank harridan, questioning why an Army needed to wear uniform. I explained that we would look pretty stupid going into combat in shorts and flip flops. That comment passed 30,00 feet over her head. She then started laying into me about British Army involvement in NI (This was a few months after the 2 lads got taken out at that IRA funeral) By this point temper had risen, the scotch was kicking in, as was the Stella, I, as gently as possible, pointed out that The reason why we were there was because it was troubles in our own country unlike Vietnam which the yanks were involved in!

At this point my father, bless him, removed B&T from the proceedings and told me not to be nasty to the very nice American.

The outcome of this was that my Brother in Law didn't speak to me for 8 years, happy days.

My point is Pte Pile is fcuk em! They are not worth it.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#17
private---pile said:
i had a houseparty on friday night to celebrate me going off to catterick.

my mate brings this stuck up silver spooned slapper who then gives me a pasting on why being in the army is wrong, how that makes me a murderer, how im abandoning my daughter and finally how i should get a "proper job"

i then proceeded to tell her that "daddy" isnt a high flyer in the city and cant afford to sub me all my life like her,
that im joining the army for the good of my daughter, and reminded her of the fact i and many other fine fellows such as your selves fight for eachother not the oil hungry PM . soldiers dont choose where they go.

mate got all defensive i then told him hes a cnut and to get the little scrubber out of the house etc.

just thought id share, that these are the poncy folk we are meant to be "protecting"

Without wishing to be pedantic; just how are you protecting me? Are we in danger of being invaded by hordes of Yorkshiremen from Catterick?

We have much worse down here, we have foreign language students!
 
#18
Mr_Deputy said:
B_AND_T said:
arby said:
B_AND_T said:
Mr_Deputy said:
arby said:
smudge67 said:
Are you sure that you're not jealous because, deep down, you want your best friends c0ck in your mouth?
don't we all?
do you know him then?
He was the best friend.
naa, I'm just a predatory homosexual.
Oh I see, that's ok then!
yes be nice to him he's outside your window naked and w4nking like a monkey looking at you typing. don't look.
yeah, that's nice, keep doing that.
 
#19
old_fat_and_hairy said:
private---pile said:
i had a houseparty on friday night to celebrate me going off to catterick.

my mate brings this stuck up silver spooned slapper who then gives me a pasting on why being in the army is wrong, how that makes me a murderer, how im abandoning my daughter and finally how i should get a "proper job"

i then proceeded to tell her that "daddy" isnt a high flyer in the city and cant afford to sub me all my life like her,
that im joining the army for the good of my daughter, and reminded her of the fact i and many other fine fellows such as your selves fight for eachother not the oil hungry PM . soldiers dont choose where they go.

mate got all defensive i then told him hes a cnut and to get the little scrubber out of the house etc.

just thought id share, that these are the poncy folk we are meant to be "protecting"

Without wishing to be pedantic; just how are you protecting me? Are we in danger of being invaded by hordes of Yorkshiremen from Catterick?

We have much worse down here, we have foreign language students!
And you have probably shagged most of them
 

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