Fattie Fighting

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Gaz_ED, Jan 30, 2008.

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  1. Watching archive footage of Big Daddy and Giant haystacks got me thinking.....

    If in a pub brawl type situation, what would be the best way to take a fat fella out of the game?

    Punch to the head? Body shots must be ineffective? Throw crisps at the fat cnut?

    Has anyone ever had a battle with a big fat fella?

    It's no wonder I don't sleep....... :x
  2. Aim for the Crown Jewels and run !!!!!!!!!!
  3. Simple, walk around the room. The fat cnut will probably have a heart attack with the effort of trying to move his bloated carcus.
  4. Bring along another fattie and a single bag of chips. They'll do for each other.
  5. No chance with a real fatty as his shrivelled genitalia will be protected by his belly overhang.

    My suggestion would be to do nothing, stand perfectly still and casually remark that McDonalds has a two for one offer on. His impending head long rush down the high street should result in, at the very least a stroke, if not a massive heart attack.

  6. Has anyone ever had a battle with a big fat fella?

    Does a fat chick count???? Plenty of battles with them.
  7. Have you ever gut-punched one of them? Does it have any effect?
  8. go for the knees
  9. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Fatties are no different to skinnies in the facial/skull area. Get in there really, really fast and smash them in the head with everything you've got, repeatedly until they go down. Don't worry about them picking you up and throwing you across the room, just get back in there and do it again.
  10. Ask an Indian Army historian. They're bound to have experience of tackling elephants, you could come up with some tips.

    Or Japanese 'scientists'.
  11. Don't need to punch fat chicks, just call them chubby and stand back and watch them go to the shops for crisps, chokie and a can of fizzy pop to feel better... about being chubby!
  12. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    I heard that a bar stool works wonders (allegedly).
  13. pool cues are a treat.
  14. Not a bar fight but I played Rugby against an uber pie eater. I tackled the fat cnut a good one but just felt my head and shoulders get swallowed by blubber until I hit the normal body under the whale meat. I would not recommend a gut shot as it is like sticking your arm into a giant pot of putty.

    Why fight a fatty anyway just walk away, slowly, they will soo puff out.
  15. Two underated methods for stunning any opponent has got to be knee strikes and shin scrapes, they hurt like fcuk and then give you the oppurtunity to get a head shot in, head butt to the nose hardly ever fails.