Farting in a Pringles tube...

#1
I was at a 40th birthday party last night, and while the ales were flowing well, it was still a wee bit boring. So me and the mate and the two other halfs decided to have a little competition.

This involved 2 empty pringles tubes and the brewing of some good botty burps. Said botty burps to be ejected into the pringle tubes, and at the end of the night seeing who had the worst smelling tube.

My arrse was happily in fine fettle as I'd been at the indian dips and other such spicy condiments and even if I do say so myself, I was feckin rancid.

Throughout the night I'd add to the tube until it was warm to the tough and the lid was rumbling and squeeking.

The lasses sadly didnt have as much luck as the botty burps didnt seem to want to play for them.

At the end of the night my mate grabbed his missus and I flipped the lid and stuck it under her nose. I must say Ive never seen someones face turn so many shades of green and grey, but I failed...I couldnt make her puke, she just retched a bit :plotting:

I really think this should be added to the all time greats of party games along with Pin the Tail on the Donkey and Spin the Bottle. :thumright:
 
#2
Did they base the film "40 year old virgin" on you,.... I'm guessing you're single?...lol ;-)
 
#3
buggrit said:
I was at a 40th birthday party last night, and while the ales were flowing well, it was still a wee bit boring. So me and the mate and the two other halfs decided to have a little competition.

This involved 2 empty pringles tubes and the brewing of some good botty burps. Said botty burps to be ejected into the pringle tubes, and at the end of the night seeing who had the worst smelling tube.

My arrse was happily in fine fettle as I'd been at the indian dips and other such spicy condiments and even if I do say so myself, I was feckin rancid.

Throughout the night I'd add to the tube until it was warm to the tough and the lid was rumbling and squeeking.

The lasses sadly didnt have as much luck as the botty burps didnt seem to want to play for them.

At the end of the night my mate grabbed his missus and I flipped the lid and stuck it under her nose. I must say Ive never seen someones face turn so many shades of green and grey, but I failed...I couldnt make her puke, she just retched a bit :plotting:

I really think this should be added to the all time greats of party games along with Pin the Tail on the Donkey and Spin the Bottle. :thumright:

You appear to have way too much time on your hands.

Do you realise the carbon footprint that your botty is causing. Gordon Brown would tax your arrse :highfive:


fastmedic
 
#4
Oh dont tell me...you're one o them birds that dont fart, or if you do it smells of roses! :rofl:

No I have a missus, and she happens to be as bad as me for farting, which is all good, its all natural.

Fastmedic...boredom and beer is a terrible combination :shakefist:
 
#5
In the days before cd's I was serving a 6 monther in Belize and was sent a "farting tape" by some civvy mates. The tape consisted of a soundtrack of them farting into various containers from vases to shoe polish tins.
To get the desired velocity they were pumping their colons up with an old stirrup pump.

The grand finale was a 10 second, continuous fart, which ended with a sound similar to a chainsaw been operated underwater. This was accompanied with the comment "You dirty cnut, it's all over the fcuking carpet, me mam'll go fcuking mental............urrghh I can see a tomato skin!"
 
#6
Badger_Heed said:
In the days before cd's I was serving a 6 monther in Belize and was sent a "farting tape" by some civvy mates. The tape consisted of a soundtrack of them farting into various containers from vases to shoe polish tins.
To get the desired velocity they were pumping their colons up with an old stirrup pump.

The grand finale was a 10 second, continuous fart, which ended with a sound similar to a chainsaw been operated underwater. This was accompanied with the comment "You dirty cnut, it's all over the fcuking carpet, me mam'll go fcuking mental............urrghh I can see a tomato skin!"
Lmao :thumright:
 
#7
Badger_Heed said:
The grand finale was a 10 second, continuous fart, which ended with a sound similar to a chainsaw been operated underwater. This was accompanied with the comment "You dirty cnut, it's all over the fcuking carpet, me mam'll go fcuking mental............urrghh I can see a tomato skin!"
The bill for a new keyboard is in the post, you barsteward!
 
#8
Badger_Heed
when I see one of your posts I now have to take precautions with the keypad , and that was a close call.
WW
 
#10
buggrit said:
I was at a 40th birthday party last night, and while the ales were flowing well, it was still a wee bit boring. So me and the mate and the two other halfs decided to have a little competition.

This involved 2 empty pringles tubes and the brewing of some good botty burps. Said botty burps to be ejected into the pringle tubes, and at the end of the night seeing who had the worst smelling tube.

My arrse was happily in fine fettle as I'd been at the indian dips and other such spicy condiments and even if I do say so myself, I was feckin rancid.

Throughout the night I'd add to the tube until it was warm to the tough and the lid was rumbling and squeeking.

The lasses sadly didnt have as much luck as the botty burps didnt seem to want to play for them.

At the end of the night my mate grabbed his missus and I flipped the lid and stuck it under her nose. I must say Ive never seen someones face turn so many shades of green and grey, but I failed...I couldnt make her puke, she just retched a bit :plotting:

I really think this should be added to the all time greats of party games along with Pin the Tail on the Donkey and Spin the Bottle. :thumright:
:salut: :applaud: you sir are a true sapper and I commend you on upholding our proud tradition of being more offensive than everybody else...
 
#11
Its all about standards mate. I'd feel as if I let the lads that nutured me in the squadron bar down if I didnt carry on what they taught me.

Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
 
#12
pringles tube or not, no one should have to hold in a fart ppppaarrrpppp ffff!

Although I find it more convenient doing it in a smarties tube, its much more portable! Isn't it flowers?
 
#13
buggrit said:
Its all about standards mate. I'd feel as if I let the lads that nutured me in the squadron bar down if I didnt carry on what they taught me.

Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
I think a few rounds of Shock! would get them in the mood...always worked for us :headbang:
 
#14
In the days before cd's I was serving a 6 monther in Belize and was sent a "farting tape" by some civvy mates. The tape consisted of a soundtrack of them farting into various containers from vases to shoe polish tins.
To get the desired velocity they were pumping their colons up with an old stirrup pump.

The grand finale was a 10 second, continuous fart, which ended with a sound similar to a chainsaw been operated underwater. This was accompanied with the comment "You dirty cnut, it's all over the fcuking carpet, me mam'll go fcuking mental............urrghh I can see a tomato skin!"
Cnut! I just laughed my contact lens out!
 
#15
Badger_Heed said:
In the days before cd's I was serving a 6 monther in Belize and was sent a "farting tape" by some civvy mates. The tape consisted of a soundtrack of them farting into various containers from vases to shoe polish tins.
To get the desired velocity they were pumping their colons up with an old stirrup pump.

The grand finale was a 10 second, continuous fart, which ended with a sound similar to a chainsaw been operated underwater. This was accompanied with the comment "You dirty cnut, it's all over the fcuking carpet, me mam'll go fcuking mental............urrghh I can see a tomato skin!"
damn you tea all down my nice new t-shirt
 
#17
buggrit said:
Its all about standards mate. I'd feel as if I let the lads that nutured me in the squadron bar down if I didnt carry on what they taught me.

Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
Standards set and maintained by a Gentleman of the Corp. I commend you on your true horribleness (word?) keep up the good work. :thumright:

UBIQUE.
 
#18
Holdfast said:
buggrit said:
Its all about standards mate. I'd feel as if I let the lads that nutured me in the squadron bar down if I didnt carry on what they taught me.

Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
Standards set and maintained by a Gentleman of the Corp. I commend you on your true horribleness (word?) keep up the good work. :thumright:

UBIQUE.
No, its an art form :thumleft:
 
#19
whit_RE said:
Holdfast said:
buggrit said:
Its all about standards mate. I'd feel as if I let the lads that nutured me in the squadron bar down if I didnt carry on what they taught me.

Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
Standards set and maintained by a Gentleman of the Corp. I commend you on your true horribleness (word?) keep up the good work. :thumright:

UBIQUE.
No, its an art form :thumleft:
Of which a Sapper would only appreciate, as all the others Cring. :thumright:
 
#20
buggrit said:
Next party I'll test the water with Dance of the Flaming Arseholes and see how that goes down. They might be too squeamish for Freckles.
Bggrit - you're not Michael Barrymore, are you? Fess up!
 

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