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Fancy Dress Advice

I have been invited to a fancy dress do on new year's eve. The theme is "Something beginning with M", and all I can think of is mong. Maybe I've been looking at the NAAFI too much.

To look like a convincing mong, I was thinking red dungarees complete with crotch stains, a yellow poloneck jumper and a red labboon tied to my wrist. Anything I've missed?

Alternatively, anything else beginning with M?
There's no way I'm dressing up as a bleeding sailor boy. The next thing you'll be suggesting is some loose M-link to the fucking crabs, and then I'd have to get all internet hardman on your arse and offer you out, making an ever bigger cunt of myself with each post. Not that that's ever happened before in the Naafi.
How about just wear a suit and be a Magistrate? Or just carry an axe and be a Murderer? Or wear a strap-on and pretend to be a MAN?

Or how about being a Monk? (called Harry...)
Wear a mac (intosh) and fuck all underneath, bar a rolled up stocking stuffed with newspaper attacked to your crotch. When asked "what have you come as?", open your mac, let it all roll out and shout "Fuck nose"...

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