Falklands Tour 07


Just found out I am deploying to the Falklands for 6 months in May. Wow, should come back either like an Adonis or an alcoholic. Either way, can anyone who has recently returned from that part of the world give me the heads up?

Can we get telephones/internet in our rooms?

What are the chances of getting of the island?

What’s camp life like, facilities, night life etc?

Any information would be of great help.

Many Thanks
Speak to a linie from JCUFI to put an unofficial phone line into your room, normally costs a crate ot two.

You do get off the island and a return flight to UK for R+R on a six month tour although the leave time ain't very long.

Facilites are excellent from gym's to bars, go-karting to paintballing etc.

The tour is what you make of it and beer is the main currency...... :D



They aint fantastic links but better than nothing.....

Try here for a bit more info....



My info is a few years old, but if you are going to MPA the gym is great, with a pool, squash courts, indoor 5 aside pitch. The Bars are ok, but get really boring, really quickly. WO&SNCO mess is fairly good. Telephone/Internet wise our unit PRI provided an internet computer.

You can get off FI if you work it yourself. I got on the guard ship for a while, midtour, (whilst the RN PO had month of hitting the MPA bars !!) for a change of scene. Other than that you should get R&R at Assi' (5days).

Do Stanley, the Battlefield tours and see the wildlife (not just in the bars) and the tour goes by fairly quick. I recall a bowling ally, movie theatre and well stocked video section. Admin wise buy clippers, as the hairdresser is ALWAYS busy, and is expensive too and take as much shaving foam/shower gel/etc, as the NAFFI charges a fortune for it.


Was only down for a PRT for A Coy KOSB, but get yourself invited to the Brintel(Sp?) Bar. Gleaming bunch of fellas.
The goose wasn't too bad either.
Sea Lion Island kills an afternoon.
As said do the touristy bits to numb the boredom/mess bill.


Lurgan_Stoop, are you still in KOSB/1 Scots, if you are then I may know a few of your buddies. I'm RE but I'm working with a guy nicknamed Junkie at the moment, I'm also in touch with a couple of others incase you are no longer with the Battalion and wish to catch up.
There is an internet cafe with about 40 machines in there.

As said gym facilities are great

Do as many battlefield tours as you can

Chances are you'll come a alchoholic adonis!!!
Wonder how long it will be before the Argies come back and get revenge for '82? There won't be much flag waving on the Solent if they kick the Brits off the Islands !!

still, it will never happen.
will it ?
Take some fishing kit; one of them telescopic rods for easing of packing, or post it to yourself. You can eat what you catch, the chefs can fix it up for you.

If you play a guitar, take some strings. There must be a guitar you can rent from the library/PRI/wodeva but you can bet the strings will be fcuked.

~This info is 19 years old, btw :)


it's been a few years since i was last there but R&R to assention islands is only for your second tour. You can however get a paid trip to Sea lion island.
Bloody cold that time of year.
Just bear in mind that as you're in the Southern Hemisphere you'll be there for Autumn and winter so I would suggest plenty of warm civvies.To us oldies it sounds strange to be talking about phones and internet in your room, we were lucky to have a TV, Still good luck and hope you enjoy it. It doesn't really matter where you are to a large extent it will be what you make it,
I was only down there a couple of years ago and there was no internet in rooms then so wouldnt bank on it being a certainty


Current info as far as I know is:

Phones in rooms - as said before - possible if you make friends with the right people.

Internet in rooms - damn near impossible, there are welfare terminals in the work places which if you know the password you can connect to but bear in mind that many of the welfare accounts are shared with shift workers using them during the nights, so if you want it in your room you might be causing someone else a night of boredom. It is also all dial up at 33.6K with the fastest link on mount pleasant being the senior officers who have "broadband" at 128K. Beyond that Area 51 has about 40 computers with relatively decent connections if you avoid the obviously busy times you can get in straight away, but obviously no porn allowed

Off Island - If you know the right people, had one of the girls who works next door to me just go to South Georgia for a week, and Sea Lion Island has a couple of helicoptors go there every week or so for a tenner, not a bad little place.

There is the Lan Chile and air bridge (when it works) for R&R if you can get the warrants and time away, From people I know who've been to Asi they say its pretty good there, and whenever the Air bridge lands you get a crew of air stewardess' to work your magic on, and the longer your here the lower your standards get, the bird you thought was beyond the limits of even the finest set of beer goggles when you arrive you'd chase whilst sober after a while

Its not a bad place all in, last couple of months can drag but its pretty easy


Nip down to the Harbour on a sunday and get free trips out with the 17 Port lads to see the wildlife on some of the smaller islands.
Also Berthas Beach is in that direction (penguins)

Hire a rover and go discover San Carlos, Port San Carlos (museum and Cenetaph)
Tumbledown is a must, as is Stanley (lighthouse) and Goose Green.

Go to the gym, play squash, drink, smoke and have fun, its one of the only sunshine tours we have left (without the sunshine)

Oh, forgot to add, try and get tickets for the more exclusive bars, legal and illegal :) they become currency after a while.

Crab and Sprocket :headbang:
I know it's 19 years since I was there but surely they should have finished the R&R block by now? Thus avoiding the necessity of leaving the island for R&R and blokes getting lost, or whatever.

The plan was mixed saunas downstairs next to the Rieperbahn bar, once your membership had matured were allowed into the members only area.

Then there was a 24hour bar in each of the music bars on the second and thrid floors (rock on second floor, jazz or C&W on alternate nights).

Top floor was diy hang glider building and testing, if it wasn't too windy. If it was too windy, strap a Benny to it.

Crab & Sprocket heh heh they had an RMP lady forgot she had t!ts and tried like fcuk to force her jugs through the sprocket, poor girl. Just as well there were a few crafties on hand to assist.
Scally said:
Just found out I am deploying to the Falklands for 6 months in May. Wow, should come back either like an Adonis or an alcoholic. Either way, can anyone who has recently returned from that part of the world give me the heads up?

Can we get telephones/internet in our rooms?

What are the chances of getting of the island?

What’s camp life like, facilities, night life etc?

Any information would be of great help.

Many Thanks

Heres a heads up matey.. :wink:


For Penguins go to Gypsy Cove, on the outskirts of Stanley.
Also Berthers Beach for Penguins and Sealions.
Every Sunday get a helicopter ride to SEALION ISLAND.
Register your name at the Education Centre.
Battlefield Tours to Mt Harriet, Mt Longdon, Goose Green, The usual Post Conflict Tour areas, get info from The Education Centre.


Top Bar is for Jnr Ranks
Bottom Bar all Ranks / Sports bar
The usual Messes
The "Cats Cradle" Bar
The "Crab and Sproket" Bar run by the MT / Engineers
"Castaways" Bar run by ATC
"Ronokes" Bar run by a Chilian Landlord, (Not quite Al Murray)


As we are in March now the weather is really changing for the worst.
As mentioned very high winds, all year round, sleet, Snow, Hail, Driving Rain. So pack some decent Goretex.. thumright
Also pack enough toileteries to last your stay, as they are very expensive down here, especially "Dhobi Dust", Shower gels and Deoderant Etc.

Cheque book and Card, you can cash cheques in the Naffi for a £2.50p handeling fee.
Or cash a cheque at HQ no charge, cheques usually clear in about six to seven weeks.

Hope this helps, thumright
There really is loads to do down here, you can't possibly get bored, Unless you are a complete Mong... thumright

PM...Me for any other info on the Islands.


Took my R&R at Pebble Island. Farm house / guest house. Flights from Stanley Airport. Sand Yatching was excelent. Loads of wildlife. Big bonus no other squaddies there.

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