Fake T!t Survey

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by TankiesYank, Jul 8, 2005.

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  1. Good — the bigger the better.

    0 vote(s)
  2. Bad — they feel weird.

    0 vote(s)
  3. Depends — what size are we talking here?

    0 vote(s)
  1. Doing some research and I need some ARRSErs' feedback.

    Today my sister called to tell me that she's thinking about getting breast implants. I have an inherent prejudice towards implants, as I am from L.A. and surrounded by horrible boob jobs...playing with them must be like knocking two croquet balls together — that's exactly how they look. Wooden balls under tightly stretched leather. Plus, it's sad that a woman that's fairly cute in all other aspects feels like she needs to mutilate herself to be complete.

    On the other hand, the science of implants has clearly advanced in terms of look and feel. And, as my sister tearfully pointed out when I made fun of her, I don't know what it's like to be flat-chested...it's apparently a genuine trauma in our culture.

    But the real question is, what do men think about fake t!ts? After all, they're the ones who are going to be handling them (for the most part). And who better to survey about t!ts than squaddies?

    Take them? Leave them? Encourage them? Hate them? Bought some for the missus recently? Results will be tabulated and factored into my advice to Sis.

    ARRSEttes: Your thoughts are appreciated as well!
  2. 'king hell, level-pegging on all three options :lol:

    I went for "depends", for the record.
  3. I know a girl who had it done and she's very happy with them. I think they look great (and not fake), but I'm too much of a happily-married gentleman to ask for a squeeze in the interests of comparative research.

    IMHO the secret is to go for a natural, modest size increase and not for massive comedy Hindenburgs.

    Oh, and this girl tells me that you have to shell out and not go for the cheapest deal. Hers cost a small fortune (£4000 UK) but she swears they were worth every penny, which is good enough for me.

    Too many Femi-Nazis make a big deal out of this. You only live once: be happy with how you look and if that means a bit of surgery then crack on.

  4. I can understand the trauma of being flat-chested on account of having a very small penis. But I am reliably informed that it does the job. Small can be very cute.
  5. You lying old tatsqueezer you. :lol:

    I once was made to understand the female conundrum issue when climbing with a group of mates. The harness shows off the manly bits for all to see [and, ahem, feel.]
  6. napier

    napier LE Moderator Reviewer

    Sack the survey - post a pic (or several) of the young lady in question and the discerning ARRSErs will soon tell her whether or not she needs to shell out. She may even get a proposal or dozen (although I can't say that they will all be honourable).
  7. The amount of lads I know who go "YUCK! Implants, horrible things. Tacky, fake and I don't like them on birds I'm shagging" and when asked well how many have you shagged/touched say "Um...errr....none, actually....but I still don't like them I reckon they would be fakey feeling things........and I would know right away anyhows."

    Wankers :lol:

    From a female point of view, from someone whom has had the opportunity to see and touch implanted chebs on other girlies, it depends entirely on how well it is done. Well placed, suitably proportioned implants are not fake feeling and you need to know what you are looking/feeling for to palpate the implant. Badly done ones will be the bane of the implanted's life as they will do the "barbie doll stand up" when lying down and are like "tits on a fish".

    TY your sister needs to carefully research what she wants, how she wants to look after, what type of implant and care implications post surgery and the reputation of the surgeon. Cheap is definitely not the go in cheb jobs, a good reputable plastics man is essential not some cosmetic surgeon of questionable methods.
  8. Having been patrolling a topless beach for more years than I care to sayI must comment on the advances of cosmetic surgery.It is now fairly difficult to pick out the breast augmentation jobs unless the subject is lying on their back. Otherwise they usually feel a bit different when you ,as a real gent, help them with their factor 30.
    As mizkrissi says it is important to go to a reputable surgeon. If you have any friends in the navy they could regale you with many horror stories that have happened to the transgender types they seem to patronise on shore leave. So go for quality
    In the intersts of international goodwill if you forward some nude pictures of your sister with her phone number I will circulate them amongst the younger chaps and they can call her with their comments.
  9. Get them implanted on her back. This is highly recommended for two reasons. Firstly it makes her a lot more fun to dance with at weddings, and secondly if her arrsehole holds out she will have made her fortune.
    Hope this helps.
  10. Shape is more important than size. some women I have errrm...'handled' didnt need enlargement, more like reconstruction or re-shaping.

    Gravity is cruel too. Anything bigger than 1.4 BSH (British Standard Handful) starts to head south at about 35yrs.

    Shape first. Bigguns are of course an added bonus, and if she's up for a soapy t*t w*nk in the shower every morning, you will always be at work with a smile on your face
  11. Absolutely spiffing suggestion, young filthyphil. One can't be too helpful when another chap(chappette?) is talking about their sisters funbags. :lol:
  12. One tries ones best, of course.
  13. should ' window shop ' before buying.. might want to check these out for suggestion of sizing.. etc.


    just trying to be helpful...
  14. Thank you Rocketeer. Had a quick shufti not very titillating though.