F*ckin Nigerian Scam Mails



Got this in my inbox today......theres a flush of the good old Nigerian scams at the moment. Some of them are funny as hell and I love Baiting them. I got one from Mister Mashed Willie today and decided to send him an Answer.

Mr.Mashaba Williams.
Department Of Minerals And Energy,
Pretoria, South Africa.
Tel: 0027-741 141 854
Fax: 0027-866-016-334

Attn: Chairman/CEO,

It is my great pleasure to write you this letter on behalf of my colleagues. Although, I do not know you in person, I got your contact via personal search on the internet Don't be worried because I am contacting you in good faith., I have decided to seek a confidential co-operation with you in the execution of the deal hereunder for the benefit of all parties and hope you will keep it confidential because of the nature of this business. Within the Department of Minerals & Energy where I work as a Director of Audit and Project Implementation and with the co-operation of two other top officials, we have in our possession an overdue payment in US funds.

The said funds represent certain percentage of the total contract value executed on behalf of my Department by a foreign contracting firm, which we the officials over-invoiced to the amount of US$26.500, 000.00 (Twenty-Six Million Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars).Though the actual contract cost has been paid to the original contractor, leaving the excess balance unclaimed.

Thanks for your co-operation.

Best Regards,
Mr.Mashaba Williams.

N.B Please email your confidential Telephone and Fax number to enable me contact you for further clarification


Dear Mashed WiIlie!

Thank you for your kind offer but no thanks

I just recieved $800,500,000,000 from one of your Nigerian colleagues. After he transferred the funds I chopped his head off and ate all the rest of him. I now have all this money sitting in a Bank account here in Europe and I want to disappear to South Africa and live on my ill gotten gains. Now if you`re interested in moving some of this for me please send me all your Bank account details and I will transfer the funds very soon. Once I get to S Africa you can give me back my money and I will give you 5 Dollars for helping me. After this I will cut off your Head and eat you.

Please do not tell anyone about this because it is very very secret. There is nothing at all Illegal about it but I do not want my wife, the Government, the CIA,FBI,Mossad,MI 5 or Osama Bin Laden to know that I cut off Nigerian Heads and eat the rest of them. I now have quite a good collection of heads and lots of Money.

Your everlastingly faithfully in strict confidence
Greetings and Jubilations!
May the Seed of you Loins be Fruitful in the Belly of your Woman!

Professor Doctor Doctor General (retd) ,Graduate of the University of Life,Keeper of the Flame,Protector of the Coffee Cup,Maker of Strange Noises

Mister Mbukoo Kapellmeister.
NBC,GSM NI, KFS, Member of the Order Of Mess Tin Warriors
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