Extreme frustration.

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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#1
The 'girly' topic on questions about female training is driving me crazy. I don't want to read it, but it's like a car crash; I'm drawn to read it. And we are forbidden to offer any advice, comments or to offer to help in a physical way. The standard of writing on it is enough to make one's teeth itch.
eg.


Re: Female Experiences of Basic Trg - ROBUST MOD ACTION IN FORCE
Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 11:01 pm

haha, so which one of us is Scary Recruit? Ginger Recruit?
little_bean



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Re: Female Experiences of Basic Trg - ROBUST MOD ACTION IN FORCE
Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 11:04 pm

I think I'm definately Scary! A Ziggazigaaaaaaaa!
 
#2
My personal favourite so far is:

"Somthing else I've been wondering about is shaving ie legs. I usually use wax strips or an epilator because I can't be bothered to shave my legs every other day but of course when it comes to basic I don't know if to swap back to shaving."

You just don't get that kind of thoughtful discussion from the blokes....

:D
 
#3
Perhaps you can quote from that topic, into this one (where robust moderation isn't in force) and you can vent your frustration by providing "DS answers," to the questions posed...
 

old_fat_and_hairy

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#4
True, I can't ever recall discussing shaving my legs during basic. Nor wondering if the other recruits would be shocked if we had to walk around naked at all.
 
#5
I think training females is a jolly good idea.

Can anyone help to train mine not to talk when I'm reading the Telegraph.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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#6
Aversion therapy works well. Just hit her with a rolled up copy every time she speaks. Eventually she will either stop talking or leave you. A win/win situation.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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#8
jarrod248 said:
OFH,
I can understand your frustration I've thought about offerring advice too but I thought better of it. Perhaps you should go and have a leasurely w4nk with a picture of Felicity Kenadall's breasts?
Does Felicity Kendall have breasts? Oh yes, I recall, in that series 'The Good Life' was often a cheeky little nipple to be seen.
Anyway, I'm past all that now. Nice to be a eunuch.
 

B_AND_T

LE
Book Reviewer
#9
Strangely enough I do not find myself drawn to the "Smear Test Advice" thread. Especially when I am eating my lunch.
 
#10
AAArrggghh!!

They've started watching us talking about them and started talking about us...watching them...

militarymen said:
... I thought I would have a look in the NAAFI bar to see if a thread had been started about this thread as I thought the guys would be itching to talk about this invasion of fluffyness and sillyness. AND THERE IS!! Check it out: http://www.arrse.co.uk/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=115144.html
Abort!! Abort!!
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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Reviews Editor
#11
It's not too bad, unless lunch features mayonnaise.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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#12
Father_Gundulph said:
AAArrggghh!!

They've started watching us talking about them and started talking about us...watching them...

militarymen said:
... I thought I would have a look in the NAAFI bar to see if a thread had been started about this thread as I thought the guys would be itching to talk about this invasion of fluffyness and sillyness. AND THERE IS!! Check it out: http://www.arrse.co.uk/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=115144.html
Abort!! Abort!!
That's all right, bless their pretty heads. Maybe time they learned about us, after all, they have been kept sheltered, like a princes harem.
 

Biped

LE
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#13
I'm rather disturbed that a: I feel I cannot take an active part in such a lively and interesting debate without potentially getting O2'd, or worse banned, and b: that, for such reason, my interest and experience of and in matter pertaining to the female gender cannot be of use to said ladies.

There's nothing I enjoy more than helping ladies with personal problems, listening a lot, and offering solutions from an alternative angle. Most of all, it's listening and empathising that I do best.

What should I do? Would any of these ladies be interested in my time, listening to their woes as only a true gentleman can do?

I'm happy in THIS thread to be here for them.

[christ on a bike, it's not easy typing with one hand is it?]
 
#14
Biped said:
I'm rather disturbed that a: I feel I cannot take an active part in such a lively and interesting debate without potentially getting O2'd, or worse banned, and b: that, for such reason, my interest and experience of and in matter pertaining to the female gender cannot be of use to said ladies.

There's nothing I enjoy more than helping ladies with personal problems, listening a lot, and offering solutions from an alternative angle. Most of all, it's listening and empathising that I do best.

What should I do? Would any of these ladies be interested in my time, listening to their woes as only a true gentleman can do?

I'm happy in THIS thread to be here for them.



[christ on a bike, it's not easy typing with one hand is it?]
How can a lady refuse such charms!! :wink:
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
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#15
jarrod248 said:
Biped said:
I'm rather disturbed that a: I feel I cannot take an active part in such a lively and interesting debate without potentially getting O2'd, or worse banned, and b: that, for such reason, my interest and experience of and in matter pertaining to the female gender cannot be of use to said ladies.

There's nothing I enjoy more than helping ladies with personal problems, listening a lot, and offering solutions from an alternative angle. Most of all, it's listening and empathising that I do best.

What should I do? Would any of these ladies be interested in my time, listening to their woes as only a true gentleman can do?

I'm happy in THIS thread to be here for them.

[christ on a bike, it's not easy typing with one hand is it?]
I imagine you'd help in a fatherly manner sort of looking over there shoulders, pushing them in the right direction.
He couldn't possible give better advice or listen more closely than I, after all, with all my long years of experience, as well as being a very fatherly figure ( and totally safe too, I add) I think I can help in many ways.
 
#16
old_fat_and_hairy said:
Father_Gundulph said:
AAArrggghh!!

They've started watching us talking about them and started talking about us...watching them...

militarymen said:
... I thought I would have a look in the NAAFI bar to see if a thread had been started about this thread as I thought the guys would be itching to talk about this invasion of fluffyness and sillyness. AND THERE IS!! Check it out: http://www.arrse.co.uk/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=115144.html
Abort!! Abort!!
That's all right, bless their pretty heads. Maybe time they learned about us, after all, they have been kept sheltered, like a princes harem.
Sort of like a baptism of particularly hot fire.

Perhaps, as Biped points out, curiosity will get the better of them and they will migrate into this little realm. After all, they have already spied us from afar.

Who could resist the allure of such a sympathetic, understanding and wisened audience?
 
#17
Ok...go...What advice would you guys give had you had the chance to do so on our thread?

(I have a feeling I'm going to regret asking you that! Haha!)
 
#18
Ok...go...What advice would you guys give had you had the chance to do so on our thread?

(I have a feeling I'm going to regret asking you that! Haha!)
Wax everything other than your head/eyebrows and brace yourself.
 
#19
jarrod248 said:
OFH,
I can understand your frustration I've thought about offerring advice too but I thought better of it. Perhaps you should go and have a leasurely w4nk with a picture of Felicity Kenadall's breasts?
Can you send me this pic of Felicity Kendals t*ts please or post it.
 

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