Discussion in 'Current Affairs, News and Analysis' started by armchair_jihad, Nov 9, 2007.
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Shameful and pathetic.
I hope you are proud of yourself Broone you tw@t.
Sad but true. No way in hell should Jack be allowed within a million miles of a "contentious boarding". I've done the boarding course, it IS purely designed for routine inspections and Jack is no way, shape or form equipped or trained to handle him or herself if ambushed while doing a boarding op. Regardless of what Broone or Commodore Winstanley claim.
F*ck, is Andrew reduced to that? I knew they were being hammered by the cuts, but Jesus! Don't they teach we're an island in politician school anymore?
Hit the nail on the head there,
MP's don't have to go to school or learn anything to be an MP.
To be fair, there is little difference between this and our troops in Iraq and Stan relying on the Americans for CAS. However, it's criminal that we can no longer look after our own and I just wonder what will happen when there isn't some nice kind ally with the appropriate kit, ROE and inclination around to babysit our reduced capability forces when we need them.
Some months after the Navy suffered one of the most humiliating episodes in its history, when 15 sailors voluntarily offered themselves up for capture by Iranian forces, naval patrols have resumed in the Skegness Boating Lake.
But now the boot is very firmly on the other foot. Now the multi-cultural and diversity trained team is permanently flanked by Borough Council Diversity/H & S compliance teams, replete with the heaviest manuals in the whole of the UK AOR and shadowed by a mini-helicopter provided and sustained by the Sutton on Sea Military Modelling Society. Despite the Navy's insistence that the surrender on 23 March was about "judgement not kit", the "soft hatter" stance of which the Navy are so proud has been tempered with much beefed-up force protection and a brand new doctrine.
The head of maritime operations in Lincolnshire, Councillor Abdul Rasfanjani says that if the Iranians try it again "the result would be different". When asked why he stated:
We have altered our entire modus operandi as a result of the Cornwall incident. Instead of provoking the Iranians by conducting maritime ops we have now closed up and concentrated our AOR on the east coast of Lincolnshire. Our choice of boating lake was also well thought out. Not only is this an area that is still extremely remote and un-mapped region, at a non-confrontational distance from the Persian Gulf, but the very fact that we have deliberately chosen our AOR with no access to the sea should reduce the risk of contact to a level as ALARP.
Furthermore, we have beefed up the role of the naval reserve and now have a highly-trained core capability of manpower and dual-manned pedaloes, armed with semaphore flags in the absence of a capable comms system, that provide 24/7 cover (except hours of darkness, public holidays, Ramadan and Eid, Diwali, when it is raining, windy or snowing, or at times of maternity, paternity, and fraternity leave of absence) at a distance of 25m from the Skegness foreshore.
The ace in the hole, however, is that I have forged strong connections with my cousin in Iran and, in exchange for a couple of brown envelopes, I am reassured that there will be no further untoward incidents.
Its not all over, however. Only last week, when two rogue windsurfers were spotted speeding towards the pedaloes that were deployed in traditional line abreast formation, one pedaloe team screamed to distract the windsurfers, as the others quickly scuppered their pedaloes to form a line of resistance to the surfers, before swimming towards the shore whilst simultaneously discharging a noxious brown substance in their wake. Simultaneously, two model helis were swiftly deployed to buzz the intruders, whilst a full-scale counselling team led the pedaloe crews away to safety. Potty Officer Stephanie (formerly Steven Easylay) proudly said: "It is so much easier for us now we have got that kind of back-up."
Once the biggest and best navy in the world, then for a while still the best.... its a f**cking crime.
CBO - You forgot to add that the FCO has now formalised its passive de-escalatory approach (in line with MoD practise and capability) by engaging off-duty therapists from 'Relate' to placate the governments of any foreign forces who might infiltrate Skegness Boating Lake in heavily-armed kayaks and kidnap our Service personnel.
This is a national fecking embarrasment.
Blair and Brown, do the decent thing and top yourselves.
Words fail me, what has this country become?
Thanks. Poor staff work has been an enduring feature of my working life. I'll forward this on immediately to the Commodore, Skegness Joint Boating Operations Centre.
Why havent we up armed the Fast patrol boats stationed in Gib - Archer et al?
Suppose I already know the answer.
They are on beach defence duties according to the last I heard. Apparently the Life Guards are either sick or on holiday, and there is nobody else available to keep an eye on the kiddies.
While never fond of sticking one on our collegues in the DEC, how come we don't have some of these of our own? Did no-one spot the attack on the USS Cole in 1996 and think - shit we might have a capbility gap here? Did no one look at the trend in current operations of operating in difficult Litoral environments and think - actually maybe a 100 ton fast patrol boat might be better at this than a 4000 ton one?
Is this the same organisation that allows the RAF to buy 200+ new fast jets while letting our heli fleet - which has been in heavire and heavier use for the last 20 years - turn into a fleet of (Barely) flying antiques.
When will people wake up. The cold war is over (despite Putins best efforts) People are dying now in the 99% of other operations that arn't full on war fighting.
Rant over, I'm spent!
cause the super dooper stealth type 48 can lob missiles at the chinese airforce and sink pakistani submarines at the same time
while a 100 ton gunboat can only blow the feck out of things it can see and isn't that high tech
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