Escaped "Lion" in Essex

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by shirl286, Aug 26, 2012.

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    If its true then **** meeting that on the way home from the pub
  2. Essex plod can't be that good though...says they need help to identify the lion...**** me its not that hard is it! Perhaps its wearing a mask? dressed in a Bhurka? Any other suggestions for a SERE kit for a Lion?

    From the 'Wail'

    "Police have advised residents living in the area of St Osyth, Essex not to leave their homes after a lion was spotted in a nearby field.

    The animal was seen in fields off Earls Hall Drive in St Oysth, near Clacton, just before 7pm tonight.

    Officers from Essex Police are currently working with experts from Colchester Zoo in order to identify it."

    Read more:
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  3. BBC says that all the Lions in Colchester Zoo have been accounted for, so **** knows were it's come from.

    Edited to add: in before some smart arse says, "Africa!":grin:
  4. A police artist has released a sketch of the offender and an accomplice.

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  5. Probably some pissed up Groundie in a onesie :)
  6. Further update -

    Lion was reported to have come from the back of a large wardrobe accompanied by a faun. It is believed that the lion answers to the name of Aslan.
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  7. Do they happen to have an officers leg?
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  8. let's hope it heads straight for the Towie set!
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  9. 600px-Meaning_of_life_004.jpg

    Essex Police have sent out search parties.
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  10. I can't help but smile thinking that there are going to be some VERY suprised Teddy Bears out there!
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  11. The Police better quit Lion around and get to work.
  12. Wouldn't fancy being an ordinary uniformed peeler with a baton, meeting big hairy pissed off lion who's starving because no **** will leave their houses.

    Any rough estates within a few hundred miles that the lion could be pointed towards.
  13. In Essex? Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots.
  14. If a Gazza's best mate (Raoul Moat) could evade the peelers for days, then I reckon a lion has a chance off never being caught.

    Would it be able to claim any form of title, for eating a few of the ***** who live in the sink estates?
  15. I hear it's their MANE effort!
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