Eric Pickles - we are not worthy

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Civvy Scum, Jul 29, 2013.

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  1. Found this elsewhere

    Eric Pickles? The man's a genius!

    Logically extending his argument:

    30mph speed limits - When no pedestrians are present, you can go as fast as you like.
    One-way streets - If there's nothing coming, feel free to drive the wrong way down it.
    No left/right turns - again if there's nothing coming, go for it!
    Red traffic light - ditto.
    Roundabouts - if there's nothing coming, why be forced by pointless traffic laws to drive around it clockwise if anti-clockwise gets you to where you want to be faster.

    I can't see what could possibly go wrong and they'd bust congestion like anything!

    This government has also proposed 80mph speed limits, new anti-middle lane hogging and undertaking laws, all of which have been successfully implemented.

    Off topic - time for my medicine please nurse.
    Whilst you're at it Nursey, better double Eric's dose.

    So what traffic laws would you change?
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  2. Big pointy spike poking up from the steering wheel may encourage people with six points to drive better.
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  3. Not sure you've grasped where Uncle (mad as a box of frogs) Eric is coming from on this. Just saying.
  4. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    All of this happens in Birmingham every day, the police just yawn and pretend it isn't happening.

    Eric Pickles needs to do some driving in Brum if he's got the bollocks.

    Worse driving than fucking Mumbai and Istanbul put together.
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  5. Ahh, but the Belgians and Neapolitans spit on your bad driving and show you how it is really done.

    Brummies: Bad driving walts!
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  6. Car drivers that drive slower than lorrys should instantly be shot.
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  7. And people who slow down to 20mph when they approach a speed camera in a 50 zone!
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  8. Big German cars have right of way over any cheap motorised vehicles, Joey-mobiles, horses and pedestrians.

    Big German cars do not require to use indicators, but may use the horn more frequently

    Big German cars have the right to ram anything off the road that costs 15k or less

    Big German cars may also travel lower than the permitted speed, just to annoy the cheaper vehicles behind
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  9. Which is to be expected once you accept that that's where most of them took their tests
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  10. Right on the button!
  11. I know, I drive one!
  12. [​IMG]
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  13. Ooh nice!
  14. And notice the cheery looking chap standing up and waving? What a nice chap.

    Posted from the ARRSE Mobile app (iOS or Android)
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  15. I can't imagine what is motivating Eric to suggest something which would remove as much walking as possible from a visit to the pie shop. The next step will be to legislate for such shops to be fitted with steam-powered catapults to fire the scoff directly into his face when he pulls up outside.