Equipment & Training

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by UKmDEVON, Jan 17, 2006.

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  1. I have heard that loads of TA people have been sent off the the middle east in recent time with not enough training and equipment.
  2. is that supposed to be a question?
  3. Yes it is. Just wanted to know if anyone knew anything about this?
  4. Strange statement from someone who in a previous post is "Thinking about joining"..............
  5. I have heard of bone idle journos asking stupid questions as well...
  6. Journo i think
  7. One of my lot went and had to deploy with only one ripstop puttee, no UGL for his SMLE No 4 and minimal training on the PIAT ( he wasn't even taught the stoppage drills ).
    Still he came back in one piece and kept his job so a slow news day in your office....
  8. I was never taught the IAs on the "BROWN BESS" before we deployed to Waterloo
  9. T'was the same at Agincort, a few of my mates were not even taught how to do NSP's.
  10. Unlucky when I was deployed to Gaul my pila was bent and my gladius had notches in it. Then I was transferd to my cohorts balista section and my number 2 was a complete mong.

    Go on someone give us a story about poor equipment from thermopylae
  11. Funny, my woad was a bit runny when Bennett's mob deployed over the channel looking for WMD
  12. That's nothing mate. When I was posted to Belize I was entirely unprepared for the deluge of extremely cheap sex on offer.

    A short video with clips of gunk coming out the top of David Jason's bell end were all that was supplied.

    Luckily for me I was a quick learner and I didn't have to have a w-ank for 8 months.

    Well done for pointing out an ancient phenomenon in the British forces. If you study the Bayeux tapestry carefully and look just to the left of Harold getting an arrow in his peeper, there is a rudimentary drawing of a young Saxon tom getting biffed off by ye old stores bloke.

    "Verily, thou art chancing thy arm. Thou couldst get another 2 years out of thy sandals. Now return thee to battle, for I must complete me a 100 percenteth check"
  13. You are sadly mistaken my friend. Ref the training, are you not aware that by royal decree ball games are banned so that the men folk must practice daily with longbow. And the only possiblity of an equipment shortage is if the blight of the dreaded yew weavel returns. But we are prepared! On the eve afore micklemass we have a young maiden run widdeshins thrice around yon oak tree to keep the weavel spirits away. Then we all dry bum a cow to death.
  14. And my issued bow string was far too short, I had to buy a civvy one, 2 bloody groats it cost me.
  15. Did he say Middle East or Middle Ages? Ah well, I'll just give him the answer to both:

    That git of a brother of mine sent me and the lads off with bugger all other than 10 horses each, one double-handed broadsword and a couple of wee stabby dagger things per man, some chain mail and a bunch of white surplices with a nice big red cross on - I believe in arabic it means "Aim here" or something along those lines. Had a whole bunch of bibles as well but the lads used them for roll ups and arrse wipes. Made them very hard to read afterwards I can tell you.

    Blow me if the bugger didn't nick the throne while I was away so when I came back I was also desperately short of some castles, a couple of countries and all the ladies of court!

    Still, at least my mate Robin was able to put me up at his place in Nottingham although I had to share a lean-to with that fat priest bloke and wee John the 7' short-arrse.