Evening all, i'm pretty new so forgive me if i'm going over old ground but I would like to hear about similar experiences to the following; Belfast 85, in a base (Westrock?) between Fort Fun and the Falls, and in one of the sangars there's a typewriter kind of machine thats basically there to put in car reg numbers as they pass the base, anyhow one Saturday night one of the lads gets bored and starts writing an epic/filhy love trilogy to his missus, detailing how he's saved for a pearl necklace, wants to spaff in her face, kick her back doors in etc, when the ops room buzzes and says someone from HQNI has been on the phone, demanding that "barbara cartland" stop writing as it's linked to them directly by phone line!. Another time, think it was Xmas day 88, in Ldy and the RUC we were on patrol with had passed on a few bevvies, which we were necking off and I ask our Cpl what he's doing on our upcoming leave, he then says that if he sees the CSM whilst they're on leave he's gonna proper batter the miserable fat cnut. About 2 mins later this copper enters the room, "is there a Cpl J*mes in here?", yes mate, why "your CSM's on the phone, says you're on permanent send, and wants to see you" oops!