English Hospitality

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by General_Layabout, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore
    the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and
    occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat
    with the lads, and have a pint of Guinness.

    After a while, he finds himself in a very high class neighborhood.....big,
    stately residences... no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of

    He really, really has to go, after all those Guinness beers. He finds a
    narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and
    decides to use the wall to solve his problem.

    As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobbie, who
    says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know." "I'm very
    sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really HAVE TO GO,
    and I just can't find a public restroom."

    "Ah, yes," said the Bobbie..."Just follow me". He leads him to a back
    delivery alley, then along a wall to a gate, which he opens. "In there,"
    points the Bobbie. "Whiz away, anywhere you want." The fellow enters and
    finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. It has
    manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and huge
    beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.

    Since he has the cop's blessing, he unburdens himself and is greatly
    relieved. As he goes back through the gate, he says to the Bobbie "That was
    really decent of you... is that what you call "British hospitality?"

    "No" replied the Bobbie, with a satisfied smile on his face, "that is what
    we call the French Embassy."