embarrassing things to ejaculate on

#1
I'll regret asking this but..
What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever (accidentally) came on?

Mines a..

Hamster
(by accident!)
The look of first shock, then betrayal on its face was priceless...
 
#3
I'll regret asking this but..
What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever (accidentally) came on?

Mines a..

Hamster
(by accident!)
The look of first shock, then betrayal on its face was priceless...
I'm sure, it tunnels out from your colon to freedom and gets shot while trying to escape
 
#5
my flatmates flannel right before he washed his face

..
i forgot to clean it up.
 
#6
My own mouth, quite by accident, some several years ago. I wear a ressie whilst wanking now, so it'll just wipe off if I can ever muster that sort of range again, plus I like the Darth Vader sound as I reach the vinegar stroke.

It didn't taste like chicken.
 
#13
Not by accident ... quite on purpose. A female troopys office chair in Iraq. She'd only popped out for ten minutes, the seat was still warm so i thought 'Fuck it'. By 'Fuck it' i meant have a wank ... not have sex with a chair. I just needed to clear that up. Although i did have a little sniff before i started.
 
#15
A built in electric fire at a gf's house when I was young..what a mess it left, burned on semen that wouldn't even come off the reflector (see what I did there, come off? suit yersel) with Vim, the cum on the bars gradually burnt away, but the smell of burning cum is not pleasant.

She was a redhead with freckles, she got the next lot over her tits.
 
#16
4x2 which I stuffed in the Cupola Traverse Mechanism of my Chieftain tank. It was amusing to watch my commander (Soprano 54 on here) clean his sights with it, especially when he wet it with his tongue!
 
#17
I have to admit this, but whenever I don't have a bird to hand I seem to get an impulse whenever I see something arousing to grab 2 pillows, insert cock into sock, insert sock cock inbetween 2 pillows and you get the idea, works a treat, just make sure you don't use the service ones because you'll get something akin to carpet burns in the same way wearing lambswool socks with jungle boots is a bad idea!

Pillow romping basically, and you can even use another pillow and pretend its a pair of tits!!!
 
#18
4x2 which I stuffed in the Cupola Traverse Mechanism of my Chieftain tank. It was amusing to watch my commander (Soprano 54 on here) clean his sights with it, especially when he wet it with his tongue!
You armoured farmers are all related to each other anyway, he probably recognised the taste ;)
 

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