Elmpt Station

If any other unit is reading this apart from those in :-[ not so Sunny Javelin Bks, then there is a requirement for more Heavy Good's Vehicles to bring more cake as there is plenty of arse!!   ::)

Do you know what i mean!  

...........this message was brought to you today by a member of GOD's TRADE..................LINEMEN   ;D
:eek: LINEMAN  :eek:

Don't you mean glorified taxidriver? ??? ?

However I must take my hat of to the 5 year old child that showed you how to use a computer.
Let's not start that age old (and I should know!) petty argument over the lineman trade again.

Everyone knows that they were given the job of being the Corps drivers because everyone else in the Corps could lay and join cable and it gave them something to do other than RP duties and stagging on on guard.

Oh yes, silly me.... everyone else in the Corps can drive too  :-[
???Dvr Binmen ???

Elmpt must be a nightmare for you - with the germans having to recycle everything it must cause a hell of a lot of confusion when its time to empty the bins ::)
I suppose your right burdenbarmy.......but the only confusion i get is when i have to work with Operators, or even if one is in a 1km radius, i can smell them, what a nightmare! thats the only rubbish that needs sorting out in the Corps.

God Bless the Corps and it's Lineman  ;)
Bencher, if it wasn't for the operator what the hell would you be doing there in the first place. Remember the line you lay (such a technical job in the first place) is attatched to some sort of equiptment, run by operators for staff officers. If being a driver was "gods trade" why has he played such a cruel trick and left you on the lower band
Fair play VICTOR M about us on the lower pay band still God has sorted his trademen out and Sept we go on higher pay band  ;D
and as far as laying cable out for fagops.... i make them lay their own cable and guess what ? They still F*** it up, i think i`ll leave it at that one or i may shame your trade  :p
i agree there bencher, we have the same problem with the bleeps laying a 2mtr cable.
lineman is the gods trade, and before the rest of you trades start saying we are stupid. think first most of us do have quals.
well do all have a merry christmas and a happy new year.
well thank you bencher,

another liney i take it?

once again after another exercise the bleeps out did themselfs, how many you ask! well so simple.

does it take a brain of an arch bishop, when you see a bunch of cables coming out of a haz door you should look and think well if i open this door which weighs several tons it would destroy these cables?

well yes it would, but it takes a bleep to destroy them and frankly i'm getting fed up with these lazy twats. so think first before you do something otherwise you'll met the A.C.L bar. ;D
In a shock move, the CO of the crack Blue Shirts Regt today declared war on his nearest neighbour, the Rag Tag Regt.  The CO stirred up  the kind of British Bulldog spirit last seen in "Dad's Army" when he gave his best "Capt Mainwaring" morale boosting speech to his men.  Encouraged by the silent response to this news, he also announced a new training regime that includes 15 sessions of P.T. a week, and compulsory military training during periods of block leave.  One of his troops, who wishes to remain anonymous, said "The CO is clearing off his trolley, or my name isn't 24126485 Sig Joe Bloggs, of F Troop".  Worried senior officers of the Rag Tags were this evening still trying to contact Col Melchett to discuss surrender terms.  One of them said "We don't know what we've done to upset this man, but his army is bigger than ours and so we have no option but to surrender".

The speech in full -

"Now men, I know how disappointed you are that I have failed for the 3rd time to send you to a glorious death in Iraq, so I'm making it up to you by declaring war on the Rag Tags.  In other regiments this would cause mutterings in the ranks, but not in my regiment, because everybody knows that I'm barking mad.  I look forward to our next challenge, which will be to start World War III armed only with lighter fluid and a rusty garden fork.  To prepare us for the arduous task ahead of us I have enlisted the help of a team of sadistic bastards who will spend the next hour running you into the ground.  Good luck, men, and remember...the Adjutant and myself are behind you...in my office...in England."
Perhaps someone should point out to him that children shouldn't fight cos it's not big and it's not clever...Having said that 'whips at dawn' would be a big crowd puller...we'd all be queueing up to smack im! ::)...next!
Would you hit him with the "X", the "V", the "I", or the tank (COUGH!!!!!)?   Is that your final answer?

Is it true that Col Melchett stands in front of a mirror saying "You talking to me?  You must be talking to me, I don't see anyone else here..."
And the £1 000 000 question:

Retention is:

A:  Something ****.
B.  Not in the dickshunree.
C.  Adhesive used for sticking roman numerals to walls.
D.  Trying to retain the workforce in by effective positive management techniques (Cough)(Cough)
There's a war, somewhere, that could use a man like you!...and when you find it, please notify Col Melchett so he and his Merry Men can join in as well!

And remember, men, the Regimental Motto - "Take No Prisoners!"
So how many times did a certain Lt Col get his photo in the Rheindahlen magazine?  I counted about five ;D ;D
None of the photos were taken on an Operational Tour, so they don't really count ;D
Wot..no tours?.....No MBE for him then   ;D
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