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Ed Balls – what Bayonet?

#1
I have just awoken from a dream that ranks alongside with my favourite Keira Knightley one, though for different reasons.

The essence of the dream is that I am slowly pushing what appears to be a 1907 pattern Bayonet (attached to a lovely SMLE) into the quivering chest of the Secretary of State for Children, Schools and Families a Mr E Balls.

He does not seem to like it and is wriggling a lot, gasping like a handed fish and cutting his fingers on the blade – which only seems to be going in a few millimeters at a time...dream lasts a loooong time :D

What type of Bayonet would you use and on which Politician?
 
#2
The little known and actually quite valuable (while almost entirely useless) spike for the Mk. 2 Sten.
Into (I shall disallow NI MLAs) ..... Blears.

Without any appreciable length of weapon behind it.... I'll be able to smell her last fetid breath and spit in her mouth.

:)
 
#9
Darling and Brown with both the Martini Henry triangular bayonets I have under the stairs 17.5 inches of fun, having no wpn means I will have to hold them by the sockets. :D
 
#13
Good old triangular profile bayonet from a Brown Bess, good twist as it enters the stomach and thats ripped to fcuk and peritonitis if they don't bleed out...
 
#15
Ms Caroline Flint. I'm not that good on historical blades, but something rusty, preferably without a blood channel and slightly serrated. Used anywhere that will wipe of that smug grin and stop her effusive fibbing permanently.
 
#16
Blair, Brown, Campbell, Mandelson, Hoon, Draper, Blears, Smith and Blunkett to start with. I don’t have any bayonets to hand, but I’m willing to do my best with a corkscrew, melon balling spoon and some kebab skewers.

Edited to add ...and Harman & Goebbels Mick! How could I forget them?! :roll:
 
#17
If it doesn't actually have to be a bayonet, my personal preference for putting Bliar out of our misery would be the issue shovel, the longer handled one on the left:
 

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