dwarfs in the foot guards

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by squigeypie, Mar 1, 2007.

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  1. ive just been to the tower of london, and i caught the guards changing. now i thought there was height restrictions to join the guards? there was a young lad there that was 4 foot f@ck all. im 5'11 and could see over his bearskin. can anyone join them now or is it bring your son to work week?
     
  2. Yep times are hard and the Guards will take anyone... However the right hand company/ flank are still reserved for the tall people. Unless Its the Captain of the Queens Company a few years ago where he was about 5ft and a fag butt!
     
  3. Midgets have been getting in to the guards for quite some time now.

    Poor show.
     
  4. This is somewhat ironic, considering they tried to squeeze giants into Sherman tanks in World War 2 in Guards Armoured Div.
     
  5. Defence cuts are getting ridiculous.
     
  6. Did anyone see John Reid (head of the joke office) at a community meeting when a now jailed black Islamist had a shouting match.

    The Police presence was provide by a 5' nothing (in a tit helmet)
    Met Asian cop, a real deterent to crime.
    I laughed my head off and was looking for Spike Milligan to come out of somewhere and join this comedy sketch.
     
  7. midgets.
    The regimental tailor has to dress 2 for the price of 1
     
  8. Some guards units have always had a single company for normal sized people. I think in the Micks it was No 4 Coy.
     
  9. Rumour has it that the guardsman in question is suing the M.O.D for building the parade ground too close to his arrse.
     
  10. Keep him away from steps then.
     
  11. Once upon a time they wouldn't accept a Guardsman under 6ft. It was just to difficult to dig them up :headbang: :yawnstretch:

    Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch
     
  12. Don't laugh, when in Greatcoat Order all coats are tailored so that the hem is the same distance from the ground. If they do this some shortarse is going to be wearing a donkey jacket or the tall guy will have one that reaches his ankles.

    Mind you if this continues, come the day when they merge into a single unit of Foot Guards they can bring back the title Bantam.
     
  13. Its the same as having midgets in the police, would you really take any notice if this fella said "Nothing to see here, move along"

    [​IMG]

    And of course he would say "the plane boss, the plane"
     
  14. Years ago you could join under size as a boy (under 18) . There thinking you where still growing , so you got in ,but some didn't , but you were in . Officers that was another thing . Today is another thing , times have changed . Then they would only take Harry , today Tom and Dick as well .
     
  15. Same used to happen in RMP which used to have a minimum height and weight requirement. Itywas quite obvious that the ex juniors were stunted dwarfs even at 17 but they let them through. Of course no-one noticed these odd balls who were always given nicknames such as Titch, Junior, Boy and in one case Pacamac (A Scot who was small enough to fold and fit in your pocket.)
    Most were good blokes but one or two had serious short arse complexes exaggerated by the fact that they were amongst tall people, those ones were nightmares!