An old boy is driving along the M1 in his1960 Morris Minor, bricking it in all the fast traffic, when his emergency mobile rings. Answering it, he hears his wife on the other end. "Albert," she says, "please be careful when you're driving back. I just heard on the radio that there's a lunatic on the M1 and he's driving the wrong way!" "Its not just one" Albert replies, "there's fucking hundreds of them!"