Dreams shouldnt come true.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by boobs, Aug 31, 2008.

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  1. Friday night I slipped one to this lass I knew from college and have wanted to do the nasty for going on 9 months. I kinda wish I didn't.

    It was awful and my dreams have been shattered. My dog kisses better than her for starters; although my dog is quite good now after a bit of training, and I needed a machete to fight past the jungle of hair.

    Bad times :(

  2. well if you managed to train your dog...
  3. I didn't really. My dog can't even control its own bowels, it got giddy early and shit itself.

    Might be an idea though. She wouldn't even let me put a finger in her arse; not even a flake! I'd of thought a Twix or even Kitkat- I was furious!!!
  4. Send her to me then, I'll get her all trained up
  5. post a picture and we shall judge whether or not said bird deserves such attention!
  6. Jungle hair? What's her name, Grizzly Adams?
  7. Funny that, there is a thread started by a lassie who last Friday had it with a lad she knew from college.
    She complained that it felt like he was trying to shag a dog rather than a girl.

    Of course it could be pure co-incidence.
  8. [​IMG]

    Go on and judge
  9. id hit that...until she wiped that smug grin off her face...
  10. Small world, ain't it?

    My dog is a horrible kisser too.
  11. back when i was married there was this tidy piece of fluff that was always baggin on to me and was in dire need of a munch truncheon.
    Being a loyal fool I didnt do her but had smeggy dreams of her forever.
    About a year later i ended up going through a devorce and guess who turns up...
    So i though i aint gonna pass it up this time so i adopted the position as ye do and fcuk me it was like a bratty down a mineshaft :( all my sexual fantasies were in flames.
    Having said that she cucked sock rather well :lick:
  12. And you were suprised that she was more hairy than average?
  13. She needs to put her Burkha back on.

    Well, you did ask.
  14. Why the fcuk were you kissing?
  15. No not really the amount of hair round her flange and arrse was minimal to be fair, but i did a bird in dortmund years ago and her bush went up to her feckin fat ole belly button and her crack smelt like a fishermans lunchbox :(