DP Anyone?

Twice the fun.
My doctor told me I have two pricks.
It least that is what I thought he said.
He discovered it when I was doing one of those eye chart thingies.
He recommended bi-fuckalls. :)
There's me hoping two lots of dripping quim to eat . . . unfortunately not

She's proper lush though
Hmmm, in my yoof we'd have called her a bag off, as in "to bag off or pull".

I suppose today we'd call that a bogof - buy one get one free.

Hazel two twats.
Proper photographic evidence is needed here.
I can't believe she has actually got two holes AND and arsehole. What position would they be, side by side or in tandem? All smells a bit fishy to me.

(She looks like a young Heather Locklear, and I would . Even though she is damaged goods)
Blimey, you'd need a whole fire-team to make her airtight.

Definately would though!


One hole that divides: so a weird kind of divider effect. Not sure why she's telling everyone on telly though, the dirty slunt. Unless she's advertising "services", in which case I'd be glad to let her bath in a jizz/piss cocktail. Mmmm.
The mind runs a riot with the utter filth you could conduct with her.

I see a new niche in the porn market.
The full interview in Bizarre really needs close inspection...

Uterus didelphys occurs in around one in 3,000 women. Instead of leading to a single womb, each of Hazel’s fallopian tubes lead to a separate womb, divided down the middle by an atypical strip of flesh.

Whereas some women with two wombs aren’t aware they have it, because the flesh strip stops higher up in their privates where it’s not visible from the outside, Hazel’s extends all the way to the entrance of her pussy, which only happens to one in a million girls.

“I have two holes, one to the left and one to the right,” she explains. “They look like a little yin-yang symbol! The extra piece of flesh between them becomes more visible depending on how I position my body, and how turned on I am. Sometimes it’s hidden by my labia. At other times, it stands proud by about a centimetre.”


Doctors don’t fully understand what causes uterus didelphys, but it occurs when a baby’s sex organs fail to develop normally in the womb. However, Hazel didn’t suspect that anything was amiss with her nipsy until she was 14, and began having problems with her periods.

“I was trying to use tampons, but they wouldn’t always work,” she recalls. “Sometimes they’d soak up the flow of menstrual blood as I expected them to, but at other times I leaked all over the place, Carrie-style. I chatted to a mate on the school bus about it, and I asked her if she’d ever had trouble finding the right hole to put tampons in. She looked at me, horrified, as though I was shoving Lil-lets up my arsehole!”

Hazel’s wombs “take turns” to have a period each month, and tampons didn’t always work because sometimes she was inserting them into the wrong bleedin’ vagina!

Nowadays, aged 26, Hazel takes medication to temporarily stop her from menstruating so that she can avoid the hassle entirely. But as a teenager, Hazel was so embarrassed by her schoolmate’s reaction to her rag-week dilemma that she didn’t talk about her intimate worries again for years.


Hazel was 18 when the subject of her double-dippin’ honey pot was brought up again, this time by her then-boyfriend. During foreplay, he “pinged” the extra flap of flesh that peeked from Hazel’s pussy with his finger, and asked “What’s this bit here?”

“I didn’t know what he was talking about,” Hazel frowns. “I wasn’t in the habit of bending over and closely examining my fanny, and even if I had done so, I had no basis for comparison. I hadn’t studied women’s holes closely when I watched porn, and sex education at my school was horrendously basic, so I didn’t know in detail what my own bits should look like.”

Hazel’s boyfriend kept prodding her parts, and announced, “You’ve got a middle piece here that other girls don’t have.”

The couple had been having sex for two years, and he told her he’d noticed before that her vagina looked unusual, but didn’t know how to address the matter.

Unsurprisingly, Hazel freaked out. “I ran into the bathroom in tears and grabbed a mirror,” she remembers, sadly. “I had a good look at my undercarriage, spotted the “middle piece” my boyfriend was referring to, and called my mum in a panic. Then I called my aunt who worked at a hospital. She got me an appointment to see a gynaecologist.”

The doctor inserted an ultrasound probe into both of Hazel’s holes to produce a picture of what her whisker biscuit looked like inside, then explained Hazel’s condition to her. “I thought it was a sick joke and I was shaking with shock,” Hazel recalls.


Once the news had sunk in, Hazel’s first thought was whether she might still be a virgin in one of her pussies.

“Now there was an idea that was virgin on the ridiculous!” she jokes. “I bled a lot the first couple of times I tried making love, but it stopped after that, so my first partner must’ve broken both of my hymens, one after the other.”

Hazel also had to decide whether to have cosmetic surgery. Doctors explained to her that they could remove some of the flesh that divided Hazel’s love tunnel into a dual carriageway, but only in her vagina, as far up as her cervix.

They said the procedure might make her muffin look more ‘normal’ from the outside, but the operation carried risks. There was no guarantee that Hazel’s foo-foo wouldn’t be left badly scarred or wonky, and she was told that she’d have to insert surgical dildos into herself every day – the same type used by post-operative male-to-female transvestites – to stop the open wounds inside her va-jay-jay from fusing together as they healed.

Hazel’s boyfriend was about as supportive as a blancmange bra while she fretted about her BOGOF girl parts. He blamed any and every sexual problem they had on Hazel’s unique mimsy, and even called her “defective” and “BMW” – “Body Made Wrong”.

“I stayed with him for a long time because I felt ashamed of myself and thought I couldn’t do better,” Hazel says, “but after a couple of years, I realised that I didn’t have to settle for an inferior relationship simply because I had a litter of kitties instead of just one!” Hazel also decided that surgery could “jog on”.

“I’m different, but I’m not broken – so the way I see it, there’s nothing to fix,” she grins, proudly. “And I don’t want to put a scalpel near my cooch unless it’s absolutely necessary.”


Hazel’s only remaining concern was whether she’d be able to have children. She didn’t get a definitive answer from a doctor, so when she spotted an advert for Channel 4’s health programme Embarrassing Bodies offering to refer people with medical quirks to top specialists, she felt she had nothing to lose.

The film crew arranged for Hazel to have a consultation with the world’s leading authority on uterus didelphys, Dr Davor Jurkovic.

Thankfully, his verdict was positive. Hazel should be able to have a baby, although if she got pregnant, the child would need to be delivered by Caesarean section as there’s a chance that the wrong cervix could dilate during birth.

She’d also have to use contraception if she had sex while expecting, because otherwise it’s possible that she could fall pregnant with a second, younger child in her additional womb!

If Hazel has a baby girl, it isn’t clear whether her daughter will inherit her special, dual-cockpit feature, but having done some rooting around in her family tree, Hazel is convinced there’s a hereditary element involved in her twin tacos.

“My great aunt had two totally separate wombs, and my grandfather on a different bloodline had three testicles, so it seems I was destined to have a beautifully strange front bum!” she says.


Hazel is now deeply in love with a new partner named Riki, and the couple recently got hitched in Las Vegas. He’s a big fan of her double vagina, proclaiming it to be “pretty and neat”.

“Riki always naturally slips into the vagina on his left, which works for me as that one seems more sensitive,” she muses. “The flesh between my vaginas used to tear painfully during sex, but I don’t have that problem anymore as I’ve learned nookie techniques that suit my body and, most importantly, I’m more relaxed and horny with my man.”

Riki claims that Hazel’s vaginas feel more excitingly tight than other women’s due to the extra skin inside her. People often ask Hazel if she can fit two penises inside her at once, which she can’t… however, she can do two, extra-loud, voluntary, simultaneous fanny farts!

That’s proof if ever it was needed that Hazel’s crotch isn’t botched – it’s evolved. Two wizards’ sleeves equals extra magic!

Hazel would like to thank her family, HUSBAND Riki, and best friend Holly Mamie for their support. Yin-yang minges rule!

The dirty 2-minged scutter...
Oh, fer goodness sake, look at the diagram. There's only one hole, it's just the old whiptailed bratmakers have a choice of direction once in there. Nothing a good condom or a coathanger couldn't sort out. Move along now...

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