The scene - No: 10. Frau Smidt. âBrilliant news PM, thereâs a new virus in SA thatâs killed loads a people.â âWhoopeeeeeeâ says Von Braun... thatâll take their minds of the economy.â âBut how are vee going to draw their attention to dit?â enquires Jacqui Smidt. âTell them not to panic, that should do it.â Answers Von Braun. âYou are a God.. Prime Minister.â grovels Harriet Herman. Next day: âThe swines are still talking about the economy Herman what shall I do now.â? âWe could tell them not to panic again sir.â âYes try that, but this time weâll hold a press conference, big it up a bit.â Smidt walks in. âI have some very bad news from South America Prime Minister.â âWell spit it out woman.â That makes a change she thinks.... âThere are only actually a handful of deaths and indeed, you have much more chance of being hit twice on the same day by lightning, than catching Swine Flu and the people are NOT PANICKING following your advice not to panic.â Braun: âThis kind of apathy could cost us our jobs, good news though. The USA and the European Parliament are all playing the same dirty tricks campaign and weâve even got the WHO on board.â âOh Iâm having nothing to do with that.â cuts in Harlot Herman, âdidnât one of their lot get caught kiddy fiddling on the tinternet?â Braun falls into his seat with his head in hands and exclaims, âThe World Health Organisation you stupid tart!â âThis wonât do.â says Braun. âIf they're not prepared to panic willy nilly over fek all, then thereâs only one thing for it. Iâll write to each and every one of the sassenack bastards.â âWhat will you write Prime Minister?â asks Smidt, âIâll tell em to wash their hands and not to panic.â âBut they already wash their hands and they're not panicking PM.â Replied Herman. Braun jumps to his feet, visibly angry, with one red eye glaring, extending his index finger and pointing, shaking with rage, the finger only one cm from the nose of Herman and in a fit of anger he screamed. âLook you fekkin split arrse bitch. I know youâre after my fekkin job, well you can fek right off. Iâm staying.. get the bastards panicking and fekkin hurry up about it you cock sucking whore.â Harlot Herman promptly drops her knickers to her ankles and bends over his desk shouting "Bum me! bum me! You know I canât take it when you talk dirty like that, come on Bum me!â Smidt immediately runs over to Herman laying her head sideways on Herman's back looking into his eyes and says âYes do Prime Minister, bum her and cum all over my face. you know we deserve it.â Unable to resist, Von Braun drops his trousers and makes a run toward them. But alas, he blows his load in his skids and the ladies are left wanting. But then his trousers drop to his ankles, he trips and falls head first towards Hermanâs arrse. Harlot Herman for a moment screams oh PM you are so fucking hard as his head disappears inside her back door. Just then, the door opens, and in walks.... Tune in to next weeks. Donât panic! This episode of Donât panic was brought to you by demented fuckwit with nothing better to do.