Don't forget your loved one on Valentine's day lads...........

Joker62

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My girlfriend rang me at work on Valentine's Day.

She said, "Three of the girls in the office have just received bunches of flowers. They're absolutely gorgeous."

I said, "That's probably why they've been sent flowers then."
 
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What?


You do it 4 times?
I suspect your expectations are a bit high. I'm nearly 72 myself, and I may have the desire still, but not the wherewithal to act unless little blue pills and KY warming fluid are involved. :hump: :cool::p
 

Auld-Yin

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Fecking Pandora...:x

Mentioned to Mrs Shiny_arrse that I had not booked a restaurant for Friday as we are having a few friends over on Saturday.
She says "That's OK, as long as I get a card. I wouldn't mind if you get me a little something."
Translation - "Buy me a Pandora charm, or else."

Get to Pandora shop in town, 30 seconds to walk around the displays, point to the one I want and say "I'd like this one please."
Cue ten minutes of sales patter about their promotion, signing up to the Pandora Club?? Putting the charm in a box (and bag), and all sorts of other crap.
I can't remember how many times I said "I just want to pay for this and go."

At least Tia was easy on the eye and very short, meaning I had no choice but to look down at her cleavage.
Love Actually walt!
 
Wedding Anniversary on the 18th Feb, so dodged the commercialised bullet.
Not necessarily. If she was anything like the ex-Mrs. Ruckerwocman, she would expect a Valentine's Day card and chocolates on the 14th and a Happy Anniversary card with something expensive in a box wrapped in nice paper and tied round with a scarlet bow on the 18th; otherwise I'd never hear the end of it. Squaws can be high maintenance.
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Mines in work.
She wants a Chilli for tea.
One X CCC on the hob cooking. Also God Slayer hot sauce added and a whole scotch bonnet pepper.


Johnny Cash will be playing in my bathroom at approximately 6am tomorrow morning. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
 
Not necessarily. If she was anything like the ex-Mrs. Ruckerwocman, she would expect a Valentine's Day card and chocolates on the 14th and a Happy Anniversary card with something expensive in a box wrapped in nice paper and tied round with a scarlet bow on the 18th; otherwise I'd never hear the end of it. Squaws can be high maintenance.
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Does the squaw appreciate being called a squaw and does one have to tread carefully so as not to receive a scalping?
 

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