Doggy Deathcamps - Good idea or have you a better one?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by steven seagull, Mar 22, 2013.

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  1. I was having a wee browse on t'net this morning and came across an e-pertition demanding the closure of a unit in Texas where stray dogs are taken to be gassed with Carbon Monoxide. Apparently there are 16 states in the US that have these sort of units and PETA state that at least one state uses a decompression chamber which to be honest seems a tad fucking mental even by my deeply black sense of humour.

    The main complaint seems to be not that these dogs are being rounded up and executed but that it's a painful way of despatch. There are other options available like Phenobarbital injections to stop the heart but there are pressure groups in the US trying to stop these types of drugs being used on Humans in US prisons because there's evidence it's a painful way to go and Humans are given a sedative before its delivered.

    There clearly is scope here for the collective hive-mind of stupidity, sadism and twatishness that is Arrse's membership to come up with a better, pain free (ish)final solution for the scourge that is the Unterpoochen.

    So off you go my intrepid inventors, do your worst and should anyone want to start dripping about this thread it's in the NAAFi, you'll find the thread for Frankenfannies, attention seekers and skunk chonging piss pants in the Health and Fitness bit.

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  2. Chav death factor would cheer up my otherwise boring TV viewing. They could watch their pit bull die first, then little Armani and Chanel.
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  3. Employ redundant Canadian seal trappers and buy shares in a pickhelve factory. It's the kindest way.
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  4. It's not a painful way to go.

    I watched a thing recently on Youtube about execution. The (quite well known and respected... can't remember his name though) was looking for the perfect way to go. He went back through hanging and gassing and lethal injection and found fault always.

    But then he looked at hypoxia, simply being deprived of oxygen. They put him in a room on I think, and air force base and whipped away the oxygen. He pissed himself laughing. When they opened the door and got him back to normal, they told him that he was only a minute or two away from death. They asked him how he felt about it and he said he was over the moon at the time. Definitely humane.
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  5. Choking Spike on a child has been tried across the North East regularly mate. Unfortunately the OB have to get involved and it does give chavs the opportunity to start two Facebook tribute pages so it's a non starter unless we can pump the dogs up on steroids and do a Hunger Games type deal.
  6. Cheap, instant and painless... nuff said

    Attached Files:

  7. It's Texas FFS, some granny with twin mounted mini guns will be happy to take on moving targets.

    California and San Francisco will bum them to death.

    NY will eat them.
  8. Armani and Chanel - I'm going to pen a letter to the First Sea Lord suggesting that the next two boats they buy should be called HMS Armani and HMS Chanel - they would go well with HMS Duncan.
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  9. Live exports to Taiwan Thailand Korea (North and South)?
  10. Logistically a nightmare and we aint exactly got time to train a black talking Pakistani lad in a tracksuit on how to pilot said floating takeaway delivery service.

    I may be able to compromise on a fuck off slingshot that will launch really diseased or vicious dogs into France.

    Or back to Mumsnet.
  11. No need fror a slingshot, just pack them into the boots of east europeans returning with all that money.
  12. As per the Running Man 'Climbing for Dollars' dogs and chavs in one quick go
  13. Save a fortune by employing a Fijian in the British Army, issue him with a bottle of Johnnie Walker Red Label, paste photographs of his wife onto every dog with a death warrant and voila!

    Instant doggie death on a massive scale.
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  14. Just send a Gurkha chef in.