Dog Rugby

FORMER_FYRDMAN

LE
Book Reviewer
With the Rugby World Cup Final fast approaching, there seem to be a lot of pundits picking their team.

In order to pass the time while waiting to collect my Springer from the vet today, where he'd gone for a sewing bee following his latest rash charge into heavy cover after feathered things which resulted in a nasty cut to the shoulder, I wondered what a dog rugby team would look like made up of recognised breeds but no duplicates.

Here's my pick:

Props: Pitbull and Staffy - right size, shape and bags of aggression
Hooker: Jack Russell - typifies the idea of the size of the fight in the dog. I did toy with a Patterdale but the yellow card count would be prohibitive.
2nd Row: Great Dane and Irish Wolfhound - long leggy speed merchants
Open Side: Springer Spaniel - fearless and runs forever, first to the breakdown without question.
Blindside: Dalmation - the right combination of bulk, speed and stamina.
Number 8: Rhodesian Ridgeback - lots of go forward
Scrum Half: Cocker Spaniel - speed, intelligence and extremely annoying
Fly Half: Border Collie - Intelligent and clearly the key playmaker
Inside Centre: Labrador - reasonably quick and bulky
Outside Centre: Rottweiler - guaranteed linebreak
Wings: Whippet and Greyhound - self evident
Full Back: Alsatian - ultimate all-rounder

Clearly this team is nailed on for rugby glory.
 
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Auld-Yin

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With the Rugby World Cup Final fast approaching, there seem to be a lot of pundits picking their team.

In order to pass the time while waiting to collect my Springer from the vet today, where he'd gone for a sewing bee following his latest rash charge into heavy cover after feathered things, resulting in a nasty cut to the shoulder, I wondered what a dog rugby team would look like made up of recognised breeds but no duplicates.

Here's my pick:

Props: Pitbull and Staffy - right size, shape and backs of aggression
Hooker: Jack Russell - typifies the idea of the size of the fight in the dog. I did toy with a Patterdale but the yellow card count would be prohibitive.
2nd Row: Great Dane and Irish Wolfhound - long leggy speed merchants
Open Side: Springer Spaniel - fearless and runs forever, first to the breakdown without question.
Blindside: Dalmation - the right combination of bulk, speed and stamina.
Number 8: Rhodesian Ridgeback - lots of go forward
Scrum Half: Cocker Spaniel - speed, intelligence and extremely annoying
Fly Half: Border Collie - Intelligent and clearly the key playmaker
Inside Centre: Labrador - reasonably quick and bulky
Outside Centre: Rottweiler - guaranteed linebreak
Wings: Whippet and Greyhound - self evident
Full Back: Alsatian - ultimate all-rounder

Clearly this team is nailed on for rugby glory.
You're barking.
 
Props: Pitbull and Staffy - right size, shape and backs of aggression
Hooker: Jack Russell - typifies the idea of the size of the fight in the dog. I did toy with a Patterdale but the yellow card count would be prohibitive.
2nd Row: Great Dane and Irish Wolfhound - long leggy speed merchants
Are you just going for temperament, intelligence and aggression?

If body size factors in to this then all I can see is the poor terrier held in mid-air scrabbling its rear legs at the ball. Not that that would last very long as the taller second row would push the front row face-first into the turf.
 

FORMER_FYRDMAN

LE
Book Reviewer
Are you just going for temperament, intelligence and aggression?

If body size factors in to this then all I can see is the poor terrier held in mid-air scrabbling its rear legs at the ball. Not that that would last very long as the taller second row would push the front row face-first into the turf.
No, we'd simply take the scrum horribly low, which always used to start a fight in my experience.
 

Auld-Yin

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Yellow card for licking your bollox in a ruck, red card for licking someone else's bollox in a ruck - come to think of it I think I played in a few games like that in the past
 

BratMedic

LE
Book Reviewer
Yellow card for licking your bollox in a ruck, red card for licking someone else's bollox in a ruck - come to think of it I think I played in a few games like that in the past
I'm sure I played against you, what's your bum smell like?:eek:
 

FORMER_FYRDMAN

LE
Book Reviewer
Oi, no leg humping.
 
Not sure about the GS as full back.
I would prefer a bit more of a specialist, a Doberman would do, they tend to look superior when strutting their stuff and when fired up are lethal on the attack and will defend as if their lives and that of team mates depends on it. If they could they would stick their paws in their pockets and stare the opposition down with their supercilious demeanour.
 
I did toy with a Patterdale but the yellow card count would be prohibitive.
Why didn't you post this before I allowed the Mrs, to bring one of the psychopathic, full on mental ******* into the house?
It spends its day plotting on how to either kill, eat or **** everything within its orbit.
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
Why didn't you post this before I allowed the Mrs, to bring one of the psychopathic, full on mental ******* into the house?
It spends its day plotting on how to either kill, eat or **** everything within its orbit.
Hmm, patterdales aren’t owned, tolerated perhaps by people who don’t respect their own property
 

B42T

LE
Agree with your Great Dane, I have one and they are unbelievably quick.
mine has yet to be caught by any dog in a game of Chase in which she indulges frequently.
my next door neighbour was out with his 2 ridgebacks and didn't see us in same field until he heard what he honestly thought was a horse charging towards his hounds. He was looking around frantically as all he could hear was something galloping out of the low mist directly at him, then saw the black beast veer off at last second and his 2 then gave chase. Not a chance of them catching her. :-D
 

OneTenner

LE
Book Reviewer
Not sure about the GS as full back.
I would prefer a bit more of a specialist, a Doberman would do, they tend to look superior when strutting their stuff and when fired up are lethal on the attack and will defend as if their lives and that of team mates depends on it. If they could they would stick their paws in their pockets and stare the opposition down with their supercilious demeanour.
A Dobermann doesn't have the stamina of a GSD - or (with the right training) the focus - they're also generally not food motivated (unlike our Ridgeback!) so won't be distracted by errant meat based products eminating from the audience....
I'd also change the inside centre for an English Mastiff
 
You could have 15 springer spaniels and call them the French National team - you never know how the mad bastàrds will perform, but it will be entertaining.
 
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